Life in the Fast Lane

Happy Saturday, Everyone!  For many, I am sure that this is part of a LONG weekend.  For me, I am taking it easy fighting a summer cold and not wanting to deal with the shoobies even though I know that their business is vital to the shore communities.

Looking back on my past, where I have been and all that I have done – I would not be who I am TODAY if it were not for the trials I experienced on this journey.  My life in Atlantic City was based on the approval that I sought from those on the outside – my boss, my co-workers, my friends and sometimes even my family.   I was never really happy with me – I lacked the self-confidence and wanted everyone to like me.  Well, that didn’t work in the casino industry so when I joined AC Hotel Reservations to help Adele build a new business – I took the opposite approach.  Hard-nose, no nonsense, and sometimes insensitive boss – ask my staff.  My staff didn’t like me but together Adele and I built an amazing business.  There was lots travel (all over the country), drinking (Adele loved to party) and drugs (my escape since I didn’t care for the weight gain or the feeling that alcohol gave me in the morning).  This is the life that I lead for more than 6 years.  A life in denial of my drug addiction and the damage that the “fast lane” was doing to me physically, emotionally and spiritually.  Not the best way to run a business as Adele later found out when she had to close the reservation center.  This was my first real exposure to running your own business – make it, spend it, no business plans – can you say “bad business practices”.

  The blessing through all of this was that I met Belinda’s biological father.  We were in love (so I thought) and were even planning on getting married until I told him I was pregnant.  To say, the least, he wasn’t happy about it and after months of turmoil when Belinda was born he decided NOT to be a part of her like.  His loss because if I must say so myself, she is an AMAZING kid (okay, she will always be my kid even at 24).  Once Belinda was born, I went back to the fast life of Atlantic City and work.  My drug addiction would end many things over the next 2 years – my life in AC, my credibility as a business person, shatter what little self-esteem I had and lead me on a rough road that would eventually bring me to recovery in 1990.

I am sure there are many who are wondering why I share personal stories or how this helps YOU “plan effectively”, right?  I am hoping that by sharing my struggles someone might find a way to overcome theirs.  If even one person reads about my crazy life and realizes that there is a light at the end of the tunnel, it was worth it.  You see I remember the trials and I have taken something positive from each one of them which has made me the person that I am today.  I don’t always have all of the answers and I still struggle with self-confidence but it is something that I work on every day.  I challenge you to look for the positive even when there doesn’t appear to be any.

Enjoy your week-end.  Have a ThirtyOne-derful day!