We have all done it, right? Let emotions rule our decisions. I am sure there are more time than I can remember where I made impulse decisions based on how I was feeling instead of thinking them through.
When we make an important decision at the height of an emotional state – whether we are angry or ecstatic, frustrated or giddy – can lead to decisions you regret. How about the shopping spree when you were feeling down? Or the eating binge? Or maybe you left a job after a bad review or incident?
Emotions are powerful. Sometimes they are positive and sometimes they are negative, but they always have the power to move us into action.
I have to admit, I take action more often when the emotions are uncomfortable – like fear or anger or frustration. The end result was to always get rid of the feeling. Yup, stuffing feelings lead me to my addiction and then to my relapse so many years later. Those inner gremlins reared their ugly head and made me feel less than in so many ways. They compared me to what others were doing in similar situations (or so I thought). The end result was some really bad decisions leading to credit card debt and more negative feelings.
Emotions can be brought on by the circumstances and events in your life, or by the manipulative behavior of a particular person in your life. The key is to take notice when you feel pressure to make an important decision in the midst of strong emotion. Is it easy – NO! The pressure of our emotions is strong. It allows those inner gremlins we thought we had dealt with so many years ago to gain some strength. Emotions or stuffing them, allows old behaviors to come back creating more of a mess.
The next time you feel pressured by your emotions, I want you to do something different…
That’s right. Do absolutely nothing. I know it is scary – trust me, I have been there more times than I can count lately. Let yourself feel uncomfortable, afraid, angry, sad – and don’t make a decision or take an action. Just sit with the emotion. No, I’m not crazy (well, maybe a little). Talk it out with someone BEFORE you make the decision. Over the last eight months, I’m grateful to have found a group of like minded people who help me through the emotions BEFORE I make a decision. I hate asking for help. I mean at 61 you would think I could make them on my own. The truth is I can’t….
We need to embrace the idea that your emotions don’t have to rule. The are not facts they are feelings. Emotions can actually teach you something. What message is your emotions sending you? What can you learn? And when would be a better time for you to make a decision or take action?
I’m a person who seeks instant gratification. I hate feeling uncomfortable. I don’t like people to see me being emotional so I stuff feelings which doesn’t make for good decision making either. Do you stuff your emotions or do you share them?
The reality is – it is oaky to be emotional. It’s natural. Just don’t let your emotions think for you. Slow down. Take a breath. Be wise. Remember emotions are not facts!
Today, I challenge you to not let your emotions rule your actions. STOP! Be still. Hold off on making a decision until you are less emotional. When we are emotional, we fell the NEED to make a decision immediately to get rid of the feelings. But, what would happen if you refused to make a decision or take action in the midst of high emotions?
Have a ThirtyOne-derful day!