Avoiding Burnout

Thank you Sharon Jaynes for today’s message.

Then Jesus said, “Let’s go off by ourselves to a quiet place and rest awhile.” (NLT)

I sat on the edge of my seat as I watched my son’s first track meet. The crowd was abuzz as moms and dads chatted, waiting for their teens to dash, sprint, or endure the eight laps of the 3200-meter race. But when the boys lined up for the hurdles event, the visiting stopped and the crowd watched with rapt attention.

Why? In the hurdles event, the stakes were higher. It became less about who would win, and more about who would gracefully leap and clear the metal roadblocks or tip and topple over the intentional barriers.

Hurdles—they are not simply found on the asphalt of track and field but also in the great race called life. As women, we struggle finding balance with our many roles and responsibilities. Our flame of enthusiasm begins to diminish when we are doing more than God intended or when we are doing what God intended, but on our own strength rather than His.

In the Bible we see many who experienced times of burnout. After Jonah’s miraculous delivery from the big fish and prophetic announcement to the people of Nineveh, he sank into a depression and wanted to die. “Now, Lord, take away my life,” he cried. “For it is better for me to die than to live.”(Jonah 4:3).

After Elijah destroyed 850 false prophets and called down fire from heaven that miraculously burned up sacrifices to Baal, the fire in his own life went dim (1 Kings 18-19). And yet, after it was over, he wanted to quit. Elijah prayed, “I have had enough, LORD. Take my life” (1 Kings 19:4).

How do we avoid those same feelings of burnout, even after a great success? The first step is to realize that it can happen and does happen to the best of us. Burnout is real. We can run out of steam and lose our drive.

What was God’s response to Elijah’s cry to quit? Let’s take a look at 1 Kings 19. I suggest you pull out your Bible and follow along.

• He allowed Elijah to sleep (19:5)–rest.
• He sent an angel to provide food for him to eat (19:5)–refreshment
• He allowed Elijah to sleep again (19:6)–more rest
• He sent an angel to provide food for him to eat again (19:7)–refreshment
• He caused Elijah to ponder what he was doing: “What are you doing here?” (19:9)–reflection
• He spoke to Elijah personally (19:11)–response
• He caused Elijah to ponder what he was doing, again. “What are you doing here?” (19:13)–reflection
• He told Elijah what to do next (19:15)–redirection
• He showed Elijah whom He had appointed to help him (19:16)–reinforcement

Even Jesus had to take time to rest, refresh, reflect, respond, redirect, and gather reinforcement. The Bible tells us this about Jesus: “Very early in the morning, while it was still dark, Jesus got up, left the house and went off to a solitary place where he prayed” (Mark 1:35 NIV).

Early in the morning Jesus went off by Himself and spent time alone with His heavenly Father. Interestingly, Simon and his companion interrupted Jesus’ time of prayer.

“Everyone is looking for you!” they exclaimed. (I’ve been there. I bet you have too.)

The day before, Jesus had healed many men and women. No doubt, the disciples and the townspeople wanted Him to return to perform more miracles. But Jesus had a different idea. ”Let us go somewhere else—to the nearby villages—so I can preach there also,” He said. “That is why I have come.”

I love that Jesus said “no” to a good thing so that he could say “yes” to the best thing. That is the bull’s eye to avoiding burnout. But how do you know when to say no? He prayed.

If you’re feeling a bit burned out today: Consider the following.

• Rest often. (God rested on the seventh day.)
• Refresh with proper diet.
• Re-evaluate priorities and responsibilities on a regular basis (monthly).
• Relegate and delegate.
• Review commitments regularly (monthly).
• Resist saying “yes” to demands and requests that do not line up with what God has called you to do.
• Resist being ruled by your schedule and allow for divine appointments from God that may not be on your schedule.
• Remove superfluous activities that interfere with or choke out God’s agenda.
• Refocus on what God has called you to do rather than what others would like for you to do.
• Remain in close and constant communion with God.

Have a blessed day!

What Do Your Emotions Teach You?

Happy Monday!  I don’t know about you but the holiday season always brings on a ton of emotions… some happy, some sad and some even angry. I know this is a weird topic for a Monday morning, just hope it touches someone’s heart.

Over the years, the holidays have changed so much for me.  They seem to have gone the whole range from happy to sad to depressing and then back to happy.  Okay, so maybe I have bumped back and forth between happy many times in between but each time during the road back, I have learned something.

Simply put my emotions are teachers.   The late Thomas Leonard, a pioneer in the field of life coaching, used to say.

Emotions are not there to simply annoy you or make you miserable or ecstatic. The annoyance, misery and excitement are there to get your attention and offer you clues about the state of your life, your thoughts, and what you should do next. When you learn to read the messages your emotions send you, you can literally coach yourself to higher levels of happiness and success.

After reading this, I figured it was time to be honest about my emotions.  It was time to ask myself, “What message is being offered to me right now?”.  Have you ever really sat down and thought about it?  If you are like me, emotions were just an expression of what I was feeling inside.  Something I usually had to get over.  I am finding as I struggle with my memory, many times I seem to be emotion-less than SMACK, I am like a broken damn overflowing.

As I journaled my feelings this morning, I came across a list from Valerie Burton from her book What’s Really Holding You Back?  Here is her cheat sheet of common emotions and the messages they send us:

Anger: A boundary has been crossed. Perhaps it is time to set stronger boundaries or protect yourself from trespassers.

Guilt: You believe you’ve done something wrong. Maybe it is time to apologize … or maybe you’ve done nothing wrong and you need to reset expectations.

Jealousy: There’s something you wish you had in your own life. Perhaps it is time to be grateful for what you have … or start creating a situation that reflects your heart’s desires.

Disappointment: Your expectations weren’t met. Maybe you need to adjust your expectations.

Burnout: You’ve exhausted your mental and emotional resources. It is time to restore your energy and fill your tank back up.

Sadness: You’ve experienced a loss, whether the loss of something/someone you had or the loss of the vision you thought you were going to have. Give yourself time to acknowledge and mourn your loss so you can move forward again.

Anxiety: You fear danger is looming in the future.

Excitement: You are experiencing something that energizes you. How could you savor it and perhaps even create more of that in your life?

Okay, so how are you feeling this morning?  I can tell you I am a mix bag of emotions including guilt, jealousy, disappointment and sadness. Kind of a hot mess, right?  The truth is despite the mess, I am working hard to not allow emotions to rule me.  I am trying to heed the lessons and move on.

Think about your day, does the outcome of your day depend on the emotion you are feeling?  Feeling excited about something (new business, new relationship, new outfit, whatever) and the day is full of positive energy and wonderful things.  Feeling guilt for eating too much, not working out, overspending, lashing out at a friend or family member – the day becomes full of negative energy with nothing going right.  This is when we let our emotions rule our day/ life.

Now, acknowledge the emotion you are feeling.  Listen for the message it is trying to send you and then use it as an opportunity to grow.  Bless and Release.  Remember the Universe is waiting to respond to the thoughts you have.  Negative thoughts bring negative things.  Positive thoughts bring positive things.

Today, I am challenging to you to acknowledge your emotions. Then listen to what they are trying to tell you.  Then decide what action will you take as a result of the message?

Have a ThirtyOne-derful day!

 

Home Party Burnout

Throwback Thursday… YES, these were all in the early Thirty One catalogs. Consultants brought boutique shopping to those who didn’t have the time or the money to shop in those cute little shops.  I am so glad that we are heading back to our roots…

Here we are in another “J” month.  I have heard from my team as well as other consultants – no one wants to party.  They are too busy, there are too many DS party plan companies and everyone is on home party burnout.  Really?

Is it that our potential hostesses are in “home party burnout” mode or is it you? Have you exhausted your circle of friends and family?  Have you moved out of your comfort zone to talk with other people about hosting or your fabulous products?  Are you excited or have you gotten bored with your parties and product?  Do you still have an emotional connection to your why?

Maybe it is YOU that has “home party burnout”!  Let’s be honest, if you were a guest, would you book a party with you? I remember the first time I was challenged to answer that question.  WOW!  I had to think long and hard about it.  We are usually toughest on ourselves but if the answer is NO, then it is time to re-visit your hostess coaching and your party presentation.  I have tried many different styles of party presenting – some fun, lots of games, open house, script, no script, everyone else’s script.  The truth was that I have tried so many things over the last year or so, I wasn’t sure what style I was most comfortable with anymore.  I thought back to my BEST parties, maybe not the biggest sales but the ones where everyone had fun (including me)!  What about you, think about that party?  What were the things that made it the best?

If you have been doing the same thing and are feeling a little bored, the summer is a great time to try something NEW.  Something that will excite YOU and your guests.  Maybe a trunk party.

How about a BINGO night.

Get creative – people are busy and the kids are out of school.  You may need to find a new way to lock in those parties.  If you can flex your schedule – a Saturday morning at the park, a lunchtime office party, coffee (drinks) after work for about an hour – do it!  Maybe a summer theme party.

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Remember, you never know when your next awesome opportunity is going to arrive, so pull up your boot straps (errr, big girl panties) and remember all the reasons why we do this business. And remember – absolute WORST case scenario….the party is a complete bust- you have some “girl time” with the hostess and make a few new friends.

Graphics courtesy of Christina’s Creations.  Which one sounds like fun to you?

Have  a ThirtyOne-derful day