How to Detox from Your Cell Phone

Well, it is the Thursday before Memorial Day Weekend.  It is when we get the first taste of what the summer will bring as the “shoobies” make their way to the Jersey Shore.  This is always a tough weekend for me…. not it isn’t because of the influx of people; it is the weekend I am reminded of the loss of my aunt, Elsie AKA “my buddy” in 1999.  Yes, I squirreled for a moment, sorry back to today’s blog post…………..

Does the picture look like you 99% of the time?  When your phone isn’t in your hand, scrolling Facebook, reading emails or sending text messages, where is it?  I will admit mine is usually close by at least within arms reach.

How often has your Hubby or family or even you wished you could have “phone-less” time!  I mean a time when the phone was either shut off, put away or on “do not disturb”?  Are you starting to sweat at the thought of missing out on notifications?  Are you already picturing the fight with the kids over not being able to talk to their friends?

Most days, my cell phone is on “do not disturb” so the only people able to reach out to me are family.  Why?  So I can stop being obsessed.  So I can work my “at home business” on my time not when ever any calls or texts.  It wasn’t long ago I realized the ONLY time I have been totally “unplugged” from everything (cell phone, computer, tablet) was when we were on a cruise.  It is an automatic switch when I get on the ship, it goes off and it doesn’t come back on until we reach the car on our drive home.  I know a week worth of emails and messages can make your head spin but the truth is, we all need it once in awhile.

If all of these boxes apply to you, you’re clearly in need of a detox

• When your thumb on your dominant hand is sore from all the scrolling
• You look at your phone first thing when you wake up
• A panic attack is around the corner when your battery is running low
• You get anxious when being separated from your phone
• You lack concentration and check your phone too often (even unconscious)

Did you answer yes all (or most) of these?  Then you are in desperate need of a cell phone detox!

Here’s what you need to do:

1. Start with 8 hours of disconnection – you’ll feel restless at first, but getting used to being phone free takes time.  The easiest way is to turn it off an hour before you go to bed and don’t turn it on until you have had your coffee in the morning.

2. Throw a phone free dinner – see how the conversation changes.  People actually talk and listen to each other.  Oh and no photos of food.  Dinner is a no brainer for me.  I don’t do the phone at dinner, especially on the nights hubby is off.

3. Go out in nature and connect to the real world.  The weather is nicer so this is a whole lot easier to do. No pictures or checking your phone.  Depending on where you go for a walk, you may need to take your phone in case there is an emergency.  I carry mine in my pocket when I go for a walk only because of the MS.

4. Set a phone curfew to turn phones off after 8PM and have a relaxing night.  Okay, so this may be a little bit tougher but I am willing to try it.  The problem is when I switch off the phone, the iPad is close at hand to check emails and Facebook.  How do you totally unplug?

5. Grab a magazine, a coffee and go soak up some sun by yourself!  This sounds great in theory but my books are on my iPad which then keeps me connected to the internet if I am close to the house.  UGH!  Solution – I have been buying some old fashioned books at yard sales so I can start reading “electronic free”.  Then I donate them back to the church rummage sale.  A win for everyone.

So, be honest… how many times a day do YOU check your phone?  I’m getting better but it is still a process.  How about you, are you willing to give it a try this holiday weekend?

Have a ThirtyOne-derful day!

Trust and Believe

“Don’t worry about anything; instead, pray about everything; tell God your needs, and don’t forget to thank him for his answers.”         Philippians 4:6 (TLB)

As we get closer to Belinda’s wedding, I am reminded that HE is in control.  Life’s challenges are curve balls when we least expect them.  Long work hours.  Title changes without pay increases.  Finalizing wedding details.  Paying bills.  Feeling over whelmed.  Tired.  Stressed.  Worry. None of the parts fitting together like WE planned or think they should

I have fond memories (okay, maybe not so fond) of putting together Belinda’s first Barbie car. Not the battery operated kind, but one she had to pedal.  It was a gift from two of my very good friends but none of us saw the “some assembly required” message on the box. To say the least it was a interesting night. Her first and LAST “some assembly required” toy.

Shouldn’t “some assembly required” be on other things in life too?  It’s not the most welcome sentence, but it’s an honest one.

• Marriage licenses should include those words, in large print.
• Job contracts should state them in bold letters.
• Babies should exit the womb with a toe tag: “Some assembly required.”  
• Relationships with family and friends should include directions.

Life is a gift, albeit disassembled. It comes in pieces and sometimes falls to pieces. Part A doesn’t always fit Part B. The struggle seems large and inevitably, something is missing.  Our immediate reaction is often to sit on a pity pot of “poor me” – no cares, nothing ever goes right, why me and the list goes on.  Would’t it be great if we could say that we ALWAYS respond in prayer? Why is it that only when we hit rock bottom, we come to God in prayer?

It is easy to worry.  It’s easy to try and fix the problem ourselves. It is easy to look outside ourselves for answers. The truth is that God has all of the answers for us. We may not want them. We may not like them. We may even try to negotiate the answer to one that we like better.  Life’s challenges holds lessons for us.  Some may be tough lessons while others may be the “AHA” that we needed to get back on track.

Hubby always says, “just have a conversation with God”. WOW! I make things so complex. I want to fix things when they are broke.  I want to wave the magic wand and make things right.  The truth is that it really is just that simple – have a conversation with God.  Share with him what is in my heart and ask for his help. Okay, the next step is the hardest one for me – LISTEN AND WAIT for his response.

Today, I am turning my problems over and leaving them there. I am going to WAIT and LISTEN for God’s answers. The concerns that I have today are out of my hands, the plan has been written and I need to lean on my faith to get me through.

What about you?

Have a ThirtyOne-derful day!

Great Questions Help Build Relationships

When you are out and about, do you struggle with starting conversations with people you don’t know?  Are you able to make great comebacks or think of “cute” “funny” things to say to engage others in conversation?  If so you are blessed.

If these fears haunt you then networking is probably one of the things that you HATE to do, right?  Meeting new people is key to our business especially in direct sales.  Now, I am not talking about at a home party or a vendor event where you can engage people in conversation when your products are right in front of them.  I am talking about those “other” meetings – chance meetings, networking events and countless other sales opportunities that are out there.

If you can’t think fast on my feet when you are out and about OR if you miss cues that would help lead into conversations where you can share about you products and the business opportunity – YOU are missing out on business.

So, how do you change that.  Savvy business people know that the key to effective conversations is to ask questions. Asking questions lets you accomplish three things at the same time.

1. It gives you control the conversation so you can direct the conversation and keep it moving.
2. It provides you with valuable information so that you can figure out the best way help to this person.
3. Believe it or not, questions communicate your interest in the other person, helping them feel appreciated and understood.

Here are some questions that you can ask in almost any situation, without feeling like a stalker:

1. What do you do?
2. How did you get into that field?
3. What do you love most about what you do?
4. What’s your biggest challenge?
5. What’s your latest success?
6. Who’s your target market?
7. Have you been here before?
8.  Who else do you know here?
9. Are you a member of this organization?
10. Who else do you know here?
11. Where are you from?
12. What do you do for fun?
13. Are you a sports fan?
14. Did you see the game last night?
15. Do you have any kids?

And perhaps my absolute favorite networking question:

Where else do you go to network?

Okay, so you don’t need to use them all but they are some good ice breakers.  Some would say that you should memorize these questions, develop a few of your own and use them the next time you meet someone you don’t know to engage them in conversation. See how easily the conversation flows.  By asking others questions about themselves, they will also respond with questions for you.  Remember the 10-second rule by Deb Bixler to ensure that you don’t monopolize the conversation.

Do you have a suggestion to add to this list? What are your favorite networking questions?

Have a ThirtyOne-derful day!