Hope Wissel

My Enemy

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It is FRIDAY!  Are you doing the happy dance?

This has been a busy AHA week for me that hopefully will push me forward in all areas of my life.  For years, everyone has told me that I am my own worst enemy, can any of you relate?  Have you ever felt like the biggest obstacle to moving forward in ANYTHING (weight loss, business, life) has been YOU!  Has the self-doubt caused you to be stuck?  Here are some things that I have tried this week that may help you:

  1. Stop comparing yourself.  This is HUGE!  I talk about it ALOT that the comparison game kept me stuck.  In the past, it has stolen my joy.  In my weightless journey, it has actually caused me to gain a few pounds back.  How do you come so far and then let a simple comparison throw you off track?  In my business, it was the “never be as good as” comparison that had me doing things like everyone else even when it wasn’t working for me.  I figured if they were at the top, I would be if I copied them.  The problem was there were other factors that came into play.  Your path is your own, it’s going to have so many ups and downs and highs and lows but it’s yours to embrace and enjoy. I’m learning to embrace mine, to trust in the process, and know that my success isn’t defined in comparison to someone else’s.
  2. Remove negativity.  Everyone knows that Negative Nellie is one of my ongoing love-hate relationships.  There are days when she motivates me to prove her wrong while on other days, it is her negativity that keeps me stuck.  I have been working hard with a counselor/life coach to remove negativity from my life.  I am not advocating that everyone get a counselor but I am suggesting that you make a conscious effort to leave behind anything in my life that just drags me down – people, habits, or just your own negative thought process. I want you to choose to embrace positivity and quit wasting time indulging in the negative sides of life. Life is too short.
  3. Silence that voice in your head.  We all have that little voice, right?  Admit it, that is the first step.  It is the  one that tells you that you’re not good enough, and the one that tells you that you’re a fraud and that you have nothing of value to offer the world. Hit the “RESET” button now!  You have to believe in yourself.  How many of us create work we’re passionate about and then second guess ourselves so we either don’t share it with others or we don’t ooze passion. It’s okay to not feel confident 100% of the time, but it’s up to us to move past that and know that we owe it to ourselves to stand by our life, our choices, and our work every step of the way.  Are you ready to stand by your life choices?
  4. Stop wasting time. Do you avoid doing things?  Do you fear that someone will say no when you ask them to book a party or join your team, so you don’t pick up the phone?  I always say I am busy but I am sometimes just wasting time so that I don’t have to open myself up to my fear of not being good enough.  So quit wasting time. Start that project, make those plans, and believe in yourself every step of the way. Whether it’s work related, or a life experience you’ve been putting off for a while – quit the excuses, feel the fear and don’t look back, and make it happen for yourself.

So who is ready to LEAP into the weekend and overcome your obstacles?

Have a ThirtyOne-derful day!

Hope Wissel, Relax, Reflect, Recharge

What Happen to Me

Thank you Traci Bild for another nudge.  It was your blog – along with some AHA moments at the ETTM Power of Connection Conference AND a comment from hubby that got me ready for today’s appointment.  This afternoon, I am headed to see a new counselor/ life coach.  She takes our health insurance – YEAH! and according to her bio, she is the one.  Okay, so I am 10 steps ahead of you, right?  Let’s see if I can do a condensed version of this journey…

Traci’s blog was entitled “The Day I Realized I was No Longer The Woman My Husband Wanted”.  Don’t panic folks, there is no trouble at home.  It was just an AHA moment for me.  Those fun things that I used to plan had turned into a routine.  The cute emails and notes – no more because we were married.  I actually came across the emails that hubby and I had written in a box…. he printed and saved them all.  My little hoarded helped me to realize how much I had changed.  I read some of them and thought “who is this person”.  The person in those letters was always smiling, crazy busy (okay so maybe that hadn’t changed), willing to put work aside to spend time with the people she loved and was romantic – totally in love with her man!  Okay, so the totally in love part didn’t change but I did!  Somewhere along the way, I got comfortable – not always a bad thing. I wasn’t sure what I was changing into but I was sure I wasn’t 100% happy.

Fast forward to the ETTM Power of Connection Conference where God began to work his magic or better yet, he picked up a 2×4 and hit me in the head.  I longed to see myself as others see me…”your smile lights up a room”, “your business is booming”, or “you look great, are you loosing more weight”.  Okay, so that wasn’t what I saw when I looked in the mirror.  Then at a pivotal point and for what seemed like no real reason, I shared a DEEP secret with another participant.  The funny thing was, as soon as the words were out of my mouth – I covered my mouth.  You know like putting the lid on a pot after it has boiled over.  LaTia smiled and simply said “now it is time for you to soar.  You have taken the first step of letting go of the one thing that has held you back”.  She signed her book “Burdens in My Backpack” and I came home ready to share all of the wonderful things that I had learned at the conference.

WRONG!  When I started to tell hubby all of the wonder things…his response “blah, blah, blah”.  I was shocked, hurt and then I felt the nudge to listen to what he had to say.  That is when he shared that “I was my own worst enemy” – really, like I didn’t know that, right?  He said, “you need to find someone who can help you finally get over this hump and move on so you can ROCK your business”.  Deep down, I think he is hoping that the girl he fell in love with over 42 years ago will return too.  Yes, that was ME!

So, after a few tears, and beating myself up a little.  I was on a mission to find someone who was not only willing to help me overcome this secret but who was also going to help me move forward in my business.  I knew all of the things that I didn’t want in a counselor which was a lot easier to list than what I wanted in one.  I actually found one that takes our insurance AND focuses on the things that I want to do in my life including my business.

So, today is the day and I am excited, nervous and willing to move on.  This secret has controlled my life for 40 years and I am ready to let it go.  I am ready to blossom and shine.  I am ready to return to the woman that my hubby fell in love with and ROCK my business.

Have a ThirtyOne-derful day!