Business Tips and Tricks, Hope Wissel, Relax, Reflect, Recharge

Self Acceptance


Happy Friday!  I came across this quote in a blog I read recently that struck home for me:

“To be beautiful means to be yourself. You don’t need to be accepted by others. You need to accept yourself.” ~Thich Nhat Hanh

I have talked about my transformation and how I feel more confident lately BUT (I hate that word) there is one thing that still nags at me (sometimes).  I don’t always accept myself.  I know sounds like a contradiction, right?

Last weekend, I found the playful silly side of me again.  The crazy clown noses, playing with hats and costumes at the circus and just being silly.  It was a side of me that Belinda hasn’t seen in  many years and sometimes, I wonder if at all.  While making dinner on Friday, she said “My mom was a workaholic but I figured that was better than being an addict so I went with it and adjusted”.  WOW!  That simple statement made me realize the sacrifices that my daughter (and my family) made over the years as I substituted work for my drug addiction.  I know, what does that have to do with today’s topic, right?

Well, it triggered a thought pattern that had me on a brief hunt for acceptance – not just of who I was or am but also from other people.  Not a good thing because this always leads me down the slippery slope of lack of confidence.  Then this quote reminded me that we need to truly feel good about ourselves despite outside opinions.  Do I like me?  Okay, most days the answer is a resounding YES!  I may not like the sagging skin from the extreme weight loss.  I may not like my toes (a new thing for me with the onset of flip flop season). Bad hair day.  Feeling fat in an outfit.  You know the usual.  Overall, I am happy with me!

There are going to be people who don’t like me.  There are going to be people who push my buttons.  There are going to be people who talk negatively about me.  So what, right?  As long as I don’t let them take up space in my head – all is good.

In my effort to “create space” that will help me fulfill my dreams – I need to be selfish, focusing inward and provide myself with  ego-boosting energy.  I am ridding myself of the negative talkers (when I can).  I am ridding myself of the comparison head game.  My new “space” will continue to guide me towards self-love and acceptance from within.

These four “mantras” were shared in the blog and they are definitely going to help me “create space” to reach my dreams:

1. No one else can prove your self-worth.  True friends can help boost it, but only temporarily. Authentic, lasting personal validation exists when you value and approve of you.

2. You are who you are, and that’s good enough.  You will have moments, even phases when you’ll doubt this, and that’s okay. Just remember: bad things are going to happen. Some people aren’t going to like you. But these are not a negative reflection of the awesome person you are.

3. Your friendship, time, and thoughtfulness are precious.  Invest these wisely and with integrity. You deserve it, as do your loved ones.

4. Be proud of yourself and all you do.  You have more than enough to be proud of and that pride should come from within and be unshakeable at its core.

What are your favorite mantras?  Have a ThirtyOne-derful day!

Business Tips and Tricks, Hope Wissel

Creating Space

As I start on this journey to fulfill my dream, one of the things that I need to do is “create space”  that is supportive of my goals.  First step was organizing my office – yes, again!  I shouldn’t say organize, I should say eliminate or move things that keep me from living the life I love.  I moved things that distract me from reaching my goal – clutter on my desk, and those piles of things that I need (or think needs) to get done.  Back to touching a piece of paper once – trash, file in the tickler to do later or take action NOW.

I am learning that “Multitasking is not efficient!”.  WOW! That was definitely a mind blower for me.  What about you?  I have forever thought I was a great multi-tasker and got a lot of things done as a result.  As I look back on the past few weeks, my attempts to multi-task has put more stress on me.  I love this quote by John Medina,

“While you think you’re good at multitasking, what you’re really doing is time slicing. You lose time each time you change tasks and your likelihood of errors increases by 50%. People who push the brain in an attempt to multitask have more anxiety, panic attacks and stress. While multitasking is typical of thousands of people, they should stop trying. You can’t do it. It is not mobilizing your God given IQ.”

So changing my space meant changing the way I think so that I do one task at a time until completed – this is definitely going to be a learning curve for me.  I am now going to block even 10 minutes spams to complete ONE task – whether it be a call to a customer or a hostess or spending time with hubby.

I can’t do it all and neither can you. Creating space will also mean asking for help to do tasks in my office.  I am confidence that this simple change will have me less stressed, more productive and thus reaching my goals.

What changes are you making to create a space that enhances your goals?

Have a ThirtyOne-derful day!