Systems Verses Sitting

Thank you Kathi Lipp for today’s message:

I am a systems girl.

Give me a new system, whether it’s in my house, on my computer, or for my calendar and I’m in my happy place. I feel deeply that if I have a good system, along with enough Post It Notes, I could rule the world.

So, when I signed up for the course on developing a devotional system, I thought to myself, “This is it! This is the secret sauce I’ve been missing all these years. If I just had a devotional system that really worked, my quiet time will be so much deeper.”

I got my system all organized (my inner Office Supply Geek was leaping for joy). There was a place for my Bible notes, my sermon notes, my prayer requests, Bible memorization and more. I loved all the tabs, lists and fill-ins. Loved each and every page of that devotional.

And then I sat down to use it.

Oh, it was fun to flip through all the pages and tabs, but after a little bit, I realized that this new system was not making me go deeper with God. It was a great tool, but the system wasn’t what I was missing.
Systems are great to help us establish routines to get us into the practice of quiet times, but when it comes down to it, what I need are exactly two things:

1. My Bible

2. A chunk of time

For some reason, I thought that the system would get me where I wanted to go, spiritually, more quickly. But God is not interested in our speed.

I realized I was trying for an instant connection, instead of giving myself, and God, time to truly linger with each other.

What I’ve come to understand is that my way of practicing the presence of God needs to be less about systems and more about sitting.

Sitting and anticipating the slow, faithful hand of God.

Sitting and waiting on his voice, even if I can’t hear it right away.

Sitting quietly and expectantly.

While systems are great, and can give me a false sense of presence. I need to take steps to go beyond the system, so that I can truly meet with God. Here are a few things to consider if you are struggling:

1. Pray for desire and grace.

If you know you should be having a quiet time, but it feels like a struggle each and every time, ask God for the desire to meet with him, and then ask him for the grace when it comes out less than perfectly.

2. Put your phone in another room.

When things feel dry in my quiet time, I want an instant hit of connection – and that’s what social media offers. Instant connection. Put the phone out of reach so that you wait on your connection with God.

3. Anticipate.

God is not hiding from you. Persistently linger in His presence. He will meet you there.

Have a ThirtyOne-derful day!

What is Your Purpose?

During a recent conversation with a good friend, I had an AHA moment.  You know the moment when you realize what your purpose is?  Or at least you think you do!!

As I get closer to my 6th Anniversary with Thirty One, I wonder how is someone’s life better because they crossed my path?  Why now?  Because I love to inspire, encourage and do things for others to make them smile.  Hubby said “you should have married a wealthy man so you could just do what you love – helping others without having to worry about bills or money.”  Would I change my life – NEVER.  Although I do want to fulfill my purpose.

So, do you know why are you here?  I don’t mean right this second, I mean in the BIG picture.  The why are you here on this planet at this time, born into the family you were born into, with your unique gifts and talents, with your experiences? There is indeed a reason we are here.  I struggle with the answer sometimes.

Many would call this our purpose or our mission in life.  We all have one. For many years (okay most of my career) I defined myself as my job.  I was a Social Worker, and a single mom.  As time passed, I became a wife and a “retired” Social Worker.    The truth was there was more to my purpose on this planet.

My deepest desire is to discover my purpose and live it. When I get to the end of my life, I want to be able to say, “Mission accomplished”? My mission gets fuzzy, what about you?  I tend to feel lost, despite the rest of the world thinking I have it all together.  I have been blessed with awards and honors not only in my previous career, but also in my pink bubble yet I long to know if I am really making a difference.  Not necessarily a huge footprint on the world but just in each person’s life I come in contact with every day.  External accolades of success are wonderful, but some times there is an empty place in your soul longing for true fulfillment.  The true fulfillment comes when you are living your purpose.

So, can you answer this one question? “How is someone’s life better when they cross your path?”  Without a lot thought and hunting for what you think the answer should be.  Don’t spend hours analyzing it – just answer from your gut.

We are all here for a reason – leaving the world a better place is our purpose. The fun part is we get to do this by using our own uniqueness – our gifts, strengths, passion and experiences.  Your mission does not have to be unique.  You do not have to be the ONLY person in the world with your particular mission.  The difference is you are the only one who can accomplish it the way you can.

God placed people in our lives who we are uniquely able to impact. They connect with you. They are around you. They are impacted by you.  I was blessed this past weekend to see this in action.  I was at an event, sharing the gift of Thirty One when I began talking about Thirty One Gives and Girl Talk. This wonderful woman explained how her school could use this program.  I have always wanted to start a Girl Talk Chapter BUT have always hesitated thinking it was beyond my gifts and talents.  God opened a door and I am running through it.

   

I’m not the only person whose mission is to encourage struggling women to live fulfilling lives.  For some reason, right now, something caused us to connect. Whether it be to let you know you are not alone? Or to make you smile.

In this moment, I get to live out my mission. I challenge you to write your purpose in one simple sentence.  Answer the question:

How is someone’s life better because they crossed your path? 

Thank you for letting me continue to share my strengths, hope and experience with you in the hope it sill make a difference to you or someone you know.

Have a ThirtyOne-derful day!

Filling My Cup

By the time this posts, I will be on the road headed for Columbus, OH! Yes, Ohio! It is that time of year again – Thirty One’s National Conference.

This year I am hitting the road with my mom and one of my team members. I am excited that my mom is joining me this year.  She has been a HUGE supporter of my business so it will be fun to share “my pink bubble” with her.

In Columbus, I will be re-connecting with old friends, and getting a chance to make some new friends. It is definitely more than just a “purse thing“. It is a sisterhood that can not be explained in a few short words. The speakers for this year are going to ROCK the house.

I had a contest on my Facebook page to help me figure out which “hat” would be this year’s trademark – which one do you think won or do you think I went out and got a new one?

So what does this all have to do with organizing or de-cluttering or making a difference?  The things that I’m taking with me to conference are the same things that you should be taking with you when you step out of your comfort zone….

So, here is what else I am taking…

A POSITIVE Attitude! Despite anything that may happen today or all week I want to attract other consultants & leaders to share our strengths, hopes and experiences.   They are ONLY attracted to other positive attitudes.  Remember the Law of Attraction?

A DESIRE to learn something from every person that I meet.  I will be taking LOTS of notes and lots of screen shots since the memory isn’t what it used to be.

Patience Patience Patience – there are going to be thousands of us there along with the Speakers, Home Office staff, and everyone else that it takes to put on a Conference. There will be crowds. There will be lines. There will be waits. I am going to use these as an opportunity to meet some new friends, or shoot a text to a hostess or potential team member and share my excitement!

What I am NOT bringing to National Conference:

Envy – while I set my goals high and aspire to be a better consultant and leader, I will NOT compare my journey of where I am or where I am NOT to someone else’s.  The comparison game and this inner gremlins can spoil everything, if we let them.

A BAD Attitude ~ We ALL have crazy things happen to us and an opportunity to complain… do NOT do it! It ruins the fun for everyone else around and they will NOT want to be around you!

My Other Hats of Mom, Wife, and Housekeeper!  This is a time for me to fill my cup.  A time to increase my knowledge and bond with my other “sisters”.  Yes, I will miss my hubby, but I can concentrate and focus better if I’m not worrying about everyone or everything  else.

How many times have you stepped out of your comfort zone and NOT brought a desire to fill your cup and a positive attitude?  When we try something new or different, we need to leave the inner gremlins of doubt, fear, envy and comparison home.  It is when we bring them along that the results are not what we hoped for.

Share your best tip for being successful when you step out of your comfort zone?

Have a ThirtyOne-derful day!

Your Best Intentions

We all have good intentions, right?  You say you want to do something but you don’t.  I don’t necessarily mean those really BIG things that you dream about; I am talking about those obtainable dreams.  Maybe things don’t happen the way you want for a multitude of reasons.  We have all been there, done that and probably have an unwanted t-shirt.

You start out with a clear vision or plan.  Maybe it is a new kitchen (that’s one of mine), the next promotion or a full calendar (this one too).  Maybe it is keeping your house clean – yes, I have grown attached to my dust bunnies.

You have or know the list of action steps necessary to make it happen.  A plan written out and maybe it is even scheduled on your planner. Then STUFF  happens – you procrastinate, fear creeps in, you get side tracked with life and the next thing you know that clear vision is a muddy mess.

Yes, I know that it may seem a little silly to compare DREAMS with cleaning the house but everyone’s vision is different.  So no matter what your vision is I want you to consider doing these steps:

Step #1: Write down what you really want and why you want it. Are you looking to please someone else or is it something you really want?  Set aside the doubts, the fears and the daily concerns.  YOU and only you have the power to light the fire and get yourself moving.

Step #2: Set aside time to quietly and honestly answer the following questions.  I know that this is probably really tough for you because as busy women, we never seem to have any time, right?  But you can do it – I believe in you.

1. What do I want?
2. What is important to me about having it?
3. How will my life change if I have it?
4. How will I feel when I have it?
5. Who else will be impacted by this achievement?
6. How will those I love see me when I achieve this?
7. Will I feel different about me? How?
8. How will this change the outcome of my life or the lives of those I love?

Write the answers in a special spot – for some it may be a journal while for others it could be a spot on your phone or if live by your planner, maybe it is on there.  You want it to be someplace that you can go to when you find that you are distracted or procrastinating.

Life is full of changes which sometimes means that your ‘what and why’ will change, too.  Your special spot will be a great source of inspiration when life gets challenging.

Step #3: Follow through is the key even when things are hard.  Motivation comes from within and when you know what you really want and why you want it – you are unstoppable.  This inner power helps you to set boundaries to the things that distract you.  It allows you to be ready for the things that challenge you on the journey to realizing your dreams!

So, whether your dream is a dream kitchen or a clean house or a new job or promotion or even to grow your current business remember to tap into that inner power.  You said you will do XYZ but will you do it?  You said you will see your vision become a reality but will you?  What is holding you back?

Share your thoughts with us….Have a ThirtyOne-derful day!

Celebrate Negativity

Are you struggling with your direct sales business?  Are parties becoming more difficult to book?  Do you feel like you are tapping the same people all the time?

As a result, are you frustrated, or having self-doubt, discouraged or maybe even a little depressed?  Have you resorted to comparing yourself to others?  Maybe you have said “I am just not good at sales” or “I guess I picked the wrong company”.

The truth is that your negative thoughts are affecting your ability to communicate clearly.  Those same thoughts affect your motivation, your perspective, your ability share (not sell) or even notice when there is an unexpected opportunity.

Negativity takes many forms.  For those of us in direct sales who rely on our people skills to build our business – our state of mind is directly proportional to our results.

I know, saying “eliminate negativity” is sometimes easier said then done, right?

Think about the times you feel positive.  You are optimistic.  You have clarity and can see your vision (or why).  You enthusiastically interact with others.  Best of all, you’re in a much better place to influence and lead others.  So monitoring your emotional state is one of the keys to success for many with a home based businesses.

I have just spent a week “celebrating” my anger/frstration.  I know crazy, right?  It was an exercise from abundance coach Eryka Peskin.  By celebrating our anger and frustrations, we gain a clue to our desires.   That was powerful for me.  Our anger (and negativity) is often triggered when our desires aren’t met…or when they’re actively disregarded or devalued. If you’re angry (or negative) about something, it’s a great opportunity to explore it and figure out EXACTLY which of your desires aren’t being met..AND what you can do to change that.

So, when you are experiencing negativity – STOP and name the type of negativity you’re experiencing.  Is it fear, judgment, impatience, etc.?  This is the hardest part because we are usually so caught in what provoked our feelings that we can’t see anything else.

Now that you have recognized it, what made you negative?  Identify the desire that you wanted.  Was it more income, more girl time, to have me time, etc?  What was your desire that was not met?  State your desire!

Next is to “Have compassion for yourself and that you experiencing this”.  Don’t judge yourself for being negative!  By judging yourself, it will only make it harder to move forward and take some positive steps.

Celebrate the negativity, identify the desire and make a plan to reach that desire.  Give yourself a mental hug. Or get someone to give you a hug. Or both!  Take a few deep breaths and relax.

When you replace the negative thoughts with a clear vision of  your desire, it will be natural to stay positive.  There may be some side effects of the negative feelings so you will need to focus on the new vision.

This simple formula of celebrating the negativity so that you can identity your desires has helped me to get back on track.  Maintaining a positive attitude will allow you to function at a higher level of effectiveness in your business.

Here is an example:  I celebrate that I am disappointed in my sales and bookings for the last few months.  I have a desire for a successful business and to do that, I desire structure that allows me to connect with people.

Celebrate your negativity today along with YOUR desire – share them with us!

Have a ThirtyOne-derful day!