Family, Hope Wissel

Happy Father’s Day

Father’s Day is a celebration honoring fathers; celebrating fatherhood, paternal bonds, and the influence of fathers in society. Today’s blog is in honor of my Pop-pop, my Dad and my hubby, Rob.

13175-poppopwestonPop-Pop worked long hours as a typesetter for the Asbury Park Press but always had time for his family. The story is told that he was the one who taught me to walk.  How?  A round hassock and a chocolate chip cookie.  Traveling with my grandparents was always an adventure. I always came home with lots of souvenirs and MORE money then I left with.  My grandparents always drove me back to college in Rhode Island after a visit home with the camper loaded with snacks and Mom-mom’s applesauce cake. Pop-pop made friends with EVERYONE, everywhere. A kind spirit, a loving smile and generous man.  On his final days fighting lung cancer, he was still sharing words of wisdom and worrying about those who would be left behind.  Pop-pop, I miss you every day but I know that you are one of my many Weston angels.

aae4e-dadLife with my dad has its ups and downs. Growing up was filled with of memories of family vacations and holidays. My junior year, he and my mom, cooked breakfast for the ENTIRE Junior Class of Ocean Twp HS after the prom. There were some hard years mixed in there too as dad battled with alcoholism and all of the demons that came along with it. When my parents divorced, I was angry and hurt.  I wanted nothing to do with my dad. On Pop-pop’s death bed, he told me “it is time to forgive your dad”. It was many years later before I would start to heal and forgive. Who would have thought that my drug addiction would be the gift that brought us together.  My dad came to visit which was the first time that we had spoken in YEARS! I don’t know how he knew where I was, but he traveled to Pennsylvania to see me. That is when the healing began. What a blessing it was to have him walk me down the aisle the day I got married.  I love you Dad!

belinda and rob No, Rob isn’t Belinda’s biological dad but over the years, he has become dad.  Growing up, Belinda’s father made the choice NOT to be a part of her life.  Her idea of what a dad should be came from her best friend’s dad, Bill Loder and from my dad.   To this day, she will readily admit that she has a hard time communicating with men.   The relationship between Rob and Belinda is special.  I will never forget the first time that Belinda text Rob the words “love you”.  Such a small gesture that brought a tear to his eyes.  When Belinda announced she was getting married, Rob claimed “this is Belinda’s year” and life has centered around the magical event.  Belinda has found her own way to let Rob know that she loves him.  “I think of him the same way I think of Pop-pop” says it all.  So Rob got the daughter that he always wanted and Belinda got a dad.  Their relationship may be different but they each know in their hearts how special it is.   I love you Rob and thank you for being DAD to Belinda.

Take a moment today and thank the “fathers” in your life.  Some may be your biological dads, your adopted dads, some may be your friends dad’s, some may be a man who helped to shape your life – whoever it is, THANK them.  They have given you many blessings.  Remember that blessings are sometimes in the form trials and it is all of those things that make you the person you are today.

Have a ThirtyOne-derful day.

 

Hope Wissel, Personal Causes, Relax, Reflect, Recharge

Father’s Day

Father’s Day is a celebration honoring fathers and celebrating fatherhood, paternal bonds, and the influence of fathers in society. Today’s blog is in honor of the three men who have influenced my life (and my daughter’s) – my Pop-pop, my Dad and my hubby, Rob.
Father's DayMy Pop-Pop, my mom’s dad, was a typesetter with the Asbury Park Press. He worked long hours but always had time for his family. My first memories of him were actually shared by other family members. See Pop-Pop was the one who taught me to walk with a round hassock and a chocolate chip cookie. I traveled ALOT with my grandparents when I was younger – seeing the country. I always managed to come home from a trip with lots of souvenirs and MORE money then I went with. I always got to keep the change. The best memories are of when my grandparents drove me to college after every trip home for a visit. We would pack up the camper loaded with lots of snacks, baked goods (Mom-mom’s applesauce cake for all of my friends) and my stuff then head to Rhode Island. Typically, I would “study” on the back couch but the next thing I knew I would be awakened by Pop-pop telling the gas station attendant that he was taking his granddaughter to college. They made friends with the guard at the college who let them park in the lot right on campus. Pop-pop made friends with EVERYONE. He would give you the shirt off his back if you needed it. His last days were spent surrounded by family at home – as lung cancer took his life. You are missed but I know that you are one of my many Weston angels.

aae4e-dad Life with my dad had its ups and downs. Growing up were mostly filled with ups – lots of memories of family vacations and holidays. My junior year, he and my mom, cooked breakfast for the ENTIRE Junior Class of Ocean Twp HS after the junior prom. There were some hard years mixed in there too as dad battled with alcoholism and all of the demons that came along with it. My parents divorced, I shut down – angry and hurt – I stopped talking and seeing my dad. My Pop-Pop told me, on his death bed, it is time to forgive your father. It took many years after that before I could start to heal and forgive. When I went to rehab for my drug addiction, my dad came to visit. This was the first time that we had spoken in YEARS! I am still not sure how exactly he heard about where I was, but he traveled to Pennsylvania to talk with me. That is when the healing began. Mind you the memories are always there but I have forgiven him so that we can have a relationship. I love you Dad!

2009-12-31 23.00.00-45Unfortunately, Belinda was not blessed with a biological dad who was a part of her life. As I mended my relationship with my dad, Belinda got to know her grandfather. Her ideas of what a dad should be came from her best friend’s dad, Bill Loder. I am grateful that he was her “adopted” dad. During her teen years, my daughter acquired her step-dad, Rob. Let me tell you, they were some VERY rough years.  Belinda didn’t want a “man” in her life as she had me.  Life was sometimes difficult as Rob tried to meld into our small family.  He traveled to cheering competitions, encouraged her and helped financially despite Belinda’s negative attitude.  I am not sure when the transition occurred but I am glad that it did.  Belinda and Rob have a relationship now that is special.  I am grateful that Rob has “unofficially” adopted Belinda who he now calls “his daughter”.

Take a moment today and thank the “fathers” in your life who have made a difference. Some may be your biological dads, your adopted dads, some may be the dad’s of your friends, some may be another male figure who helped to shape your life – whoever it is, THANK them for all of the blessings that they have given you – even during the trials for it is all of those things that make you the person you are today.

Have a ThirtyOne-derful day.