What Decision Does Every Successful Woman Make?

Fearless. It’s a frequently used word. We’re told to be fearless. It is something we aim for, right?  But what does it really mean?  According to Webster it is to have a “lack fear”.  And fear is defined as “an unpleasant emotion caused by the belief someone or something is dangerous, likely to cause pain, or a threat“.  Is being fearless really what we want tor need in order to succeed?  Many say fearlessness is a myth.  The truth is if you want to succeed and have a more fulfilling life, you need to be brave – NOT fearless.

Brave and courage are synonymous…. Courage is my word for this year.  Think about it…

If your heart gets broken, you become afraid to open it to the possibility of love, right?  Isn’t courage which gives you the hope to love again.

When you get burned out in your career (or your business) and you dream something better is possible, isn’t it courage which empowers you to try something new.

When you’ve made poor money decisions, have credit card debt or are blindsided financially and have to start over, it takes courage to believe it’s possible, right?

Over the last month, I have had the courage to make some major changes in my life.  They all actually started in some way about 8 months ago but I have had the courage to face some things head on this month.  I started opening up about my past mistakes to others without fear of judgement.  I am only as sick as my secrets and I don’t want to be sick anymore.  I see the glimmer of hope as my creative juices start to flow again – ready to venture into doing more of my angel side hustle.  I have revamped my budget and am keeping tight reins on my spending.  I am willing to accept suggestions on how to run my business from those who have a more experience instead of hiding in fear.  I am willing to accept and embrace my MS and the changes it has caused me to make in my life – facing the limitations with courage instead of allowing fear of what I am losing take over.

Do I still have hurdles to climb?  YES!  Do I still struggle with fear?  YES!  The inner gremlins of pride, comparison and worrying what people think play with my thoughts.  Each day I gain a little bit more courage which translates into a little bit more peace in my life.

No matter what your challenges or dreams are, you will face obstacles causing doubt and fear to rise up.  Those inner gremlins you thought were long buried or even gone will raise their head and feel revived when they sense even just a wisp of doubt.  The difference can be every single time YOU can make the decision to choose courage. Even if your first response isn’t courage (yup, it happens sometimes), your second response can be. Over and over again, if we are going to live authentic, full lives, we must choose courage.

Today, I challenge you to repeat this simple mantra when you are struggling – :“I choose courage over fear.”  Some days, I use the Serenity Prayer multiple times to keep me on track.  What situation or area of your life do you need to choose courage over fear right now?  Share it with us…

Have a ThirtyOne-derful day!

Throwback Thursday: Dream Big

I was scrolling through old blog posts for inspiration.  Sometimes I get stuck – wondering what to write about or if any one would notice if I recycled an old post then SMACK, I remember I would would know the difference.  Sometimes an old post pertains to what is happening now in my life so it could stand another look…

Back in 2014, St. Pauls’ UMC did a church-wide study during Lent called “Daring to Dream”.  Back then, I was in the midst of letting fear keep me from letting my dreams soar.  Funny, I am back in the same spot and I am not even sure why.

On Easter Sunday, Pastor gave a sermon entitled “Dream Busters – Dream Builders” which in a nutshell was about faith, hope and the love of Christ which enables us to fly on the wings of God’s dreams for us.  I looked back at my notes from the sermon and at the book we were reading and it was yet another wake up call for me.  I say it a lot but God is always working in my life, allowing me glimpses of what he has in store for me.   Yes, I get scared but not scared enough to keep me from reaching for those dreams. Sometimes it is just enough fear to keep me focused and working towards his dreams for me.Here are the three dream busters which keep us from reaching our full potential:

1. Yesterday’s failures. I know I am not alone in allowing the shackles of guilt and shame to continue to bind me. Of course, not as often as they used to but guilt about past mistakes do continue to haunt me.  I rehash the mistake over and over until I finally turn it over to God and let it go.  Sound familiar?
2. Today’s frustration.  Are my personal expectations too high? YES! Do I compare myself to others (personally and professionally)? YES!  Perfect Polly creeps in on occasion and convinces me if I’m not “perfect”, I will never achieve my dreams. WRONG! It is NOT about perfection, it is about the journey. One of my favorite mantras.
3. Tomorrow fears. Some days, I don’t even know what I am fearful of – fear of success, fear of not measuring up, fear of disappointing others or fear of failing?  Or is fear just an excuse for not trying?

Once we know what is busting our dreams, when can figure out how to change the dream busters into dream builders?

1. Doubts dispelled. I need to remind myself daily with God all things are possible. Remember the mustard seed? I keep a mustard seed jar close (a gift from my Director) to remind me of this message.  Because as long as you have a small amount of faith, things are possible.
2. Despair dispersed with confidence and hope.  I never realized what a control person I was until someone called me on it.  Let Go and Let God because he alone can provide for our needs.  Really?  It goes back to faith as small as a mustard seed.  Be confident God will provide for our needs.  He will also be there to wrap his arms around us and give us hope when we feel weak.
3. Security of Love. Have you ever doubted God’s love?  Be honest!  I know in my darkest days, I wondered how he could possible love me.  The truth is God’s love has lifted me up from the depths of addiction along with my sometimes shady past and he continues to love me on a daily basis.

Are these some of the barriers holding you back from dreaming BIG? I have found as long as I open my heart to God and his love, I am able to DARE to DREAM.  Pause for a moment and think about your dream.  Picture it.  Feel the feelings you would have if you reached it.  Haven’t dreamed in a long time?  It may take some practice but be still and listen to your heart.

What are your barriers to dreaming big? Share them with us…

Have a ThirtyOne-derful day!

Looking Forward to 2017

My word for 2016 was CONFIDENCE. 

CONFIDENCE to believe when the way is rough.  CONFIDENCE to hang on when the going is tough. CONFIDENCE will guide me when my business is slow.  CONFIDENCE will guide me as I move forward with the Rays of Hope – Angel Connection.  CONFIDENCE will guide me as I overcome doubt with my new contract working with a grassroots non-profit.  CONFIDENCE will guide me as I learn to live with my recent diagnosis of MS.  CONFIDENCE will guide me as I see and believe in the person that others see in me.  CONFIDENCE will guide me as I squash the inner gremlins that have haunted me all of my life.

As a wrap of to this year, I’ve been reflecting A LOT as well as praying on what my word will be in 2017.  I love the beginning of a new year, with all of the hopes and possibilities of what’s ahead, but I know it’s also easy to feel overwhelmed with having 12 brand new months to tackle too. By sharing some of the things I’m looking forward to next year, my hope is it will encourage you to think about what you’re excited about in 2017 so you can enter the new year feeling ready and raring to go!

1. 5 Year Anniversary!

I can hardly believe hubby and I will be married five years and we have been together for 16 years.  My goal is to earn the Leadership Incentive Trip with Thirty One so I can take him on a cruise for our special anniversary.

2. Adventures, big and small!

We’ve been lucky enough to do a little traveling – North Carolina to visit the girls and I headed to Ohio for National Conference.  We had adventures like traveling the State to see doctors about my MS & the many symptoms.  I want to embrace the mini adventures next year too – day trips out to explore new places, and weekend breaks.

3. Full-time in my business

I have been in direct sales for almost 6 years and I am really excited to see what this next year has to bring. I am committing to my business full-time so it will be my main source of income to help with the household bills.  No more part-time job.  I am so grateful to be able to work from home with so many amazing women.  Along with my direct sales business, one of my biggest priorities in my business next year is to continue to create different ways to show up and be of service to the community.  I feel so grateful every single day this is my job, and I want to just give it 100% and show up fully for my business in 2017 along the way.

4. Continuing to embrace less stress, more joy in work and life

This has been one of the biggest takeaways for me in 2016 – a mindset of less stress, more joy is what serves me best in my work and my life. Keeps MS symptoms at a minimum and makes for a happy Hope.  I am learning how to embrace the seasons in my life.  I’m feeling focused, productive, and inspired as I end 2016.  In 2017, I want to give myself permission to live my creative life on my own terms, and embrace my own natural ebb and flow of rest and hustle too.

5. All the growth, discovery, and lessons ahead to come

I don’t know about you, but I learn, grow and change so much during a year.  In 2016, I’ve discovered so much more about myself, who I am, and what is most important to me.  I feel so much more aware and connected to what matters most in my life. I’m so excited to experience all the lessons 2017 has to bring.

I want to thank you so much for following my blog this year.  I’m so grateful for the opportunity to connect with you every day.  My vision in everything I do with my business and online presence is to support, encourage and inspire you to be the best YOU, you can be.  I hope to continue to do it in 2017 too.

I believe this is each and every one of you…

What will your word be for 2017?  Share it with us and let’s work together to make this year a success….

Have a ThirtyOne-derful day!

Your Sweet Spot

“We have different gifts, according to the grace given to each of us. If your gift is prophesying, then prophesy in accordance with your faith; if it is serving, then serve; if it is teaching, then teach; if it is to encourage, then give encouragement; if it is giving, then give generously; if it is to lead, do it diligently; if it is to show mercy, do it cheerfully.” Romans 12:6-8 (NIV)

Do you think of yourself as ordinary? Nothing special. Forgettable.  Maybe you are an average student.  Maybe you are a “behind the scenes” kind of person.  Maybe you never really stood out in your job or your life.  Despite all of these “nots”, do you keep moving forward?

Are you still looking for your sweet spot?  That place where your greatest passion and talents or abilities intersect.    Its the special place where we feel most called, the thing that we love, that thing that we’re great at that makes life worth living.  Living in the sweet spot means having the courage to follow your dreams, take risks and work harder than we ever thought to accomplish our goals.

Finding this spot is not always easy.  I have been on a mission to find mine for some time now.  Just when I think I found it – life throws me a curve.  Negative Nellie and Doubtful Debbie visit reminding me that my gifts are not as good as “others”.  I push the RESET button and remind myself that all gifts are essential whether they are in the spotlight or behind the scenes.

I am at a fork in the road. The point where I have to merge what I enjoy (my Thirty One business) and what I believe that I am truly good at (encouraging, raising money and making people smile) with my dreams of financial freedom and helping others.  I know you are all thinking, it is a party-plan business so it is easy.  Book, Sell Recruit – those are the basics of a successful business; if you do that, you will have found your sweet spot.  For me, it isn’t that easy.  Of maybe it is and I just am complicating things.

Finding my sweet spot has been messy, learning how to embrace the God-given talents I already have, rather than those I wish I had. Does this sound like any of you?

Are you fearless?  Will you dare to take the plunge, even when it means risking failure? Philippians 4:13 reminds us: “I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me.” (NKJV)

I need to remember, as I am sure you do that we will make mistakes. We will mess up. We may have to admit defeat. Through it all, we need to keep going. We need to use those defeats as opportunities to discover what doesn’t work, but always persevere.

Each of us has a sweet spot.  It is there, waiting for you, even if you haven’t quite found it yet.  Ask for help to discover the gifts and talents you have been given.  Ask for help finding that place where passion and abilities intersect.  With God’s help, you can find it and you can do the work that you have been called to do.

Share your sweet spot with us so that we can CELEBRATE together.

Have a ThirtyOne-derful day!