Woohoo Wednesday

Rekindle Your Relationship

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Today is all about YOU!  Struggling with health issues (or any stress) can take a toll on you in many ways.  It can effect you mentally, physically and spiritually.  And as a result, your relationships may suffer.

Has stress caused you to feel like there’s no more passion or excitement in your relationship?  Do you only see frustration?  Despite the stress, there are some ways to reignite the passion. Here are some tips that I found in a recent article:

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Date yourself.   Be sure to take care of yourself first and stop feeling guilty about it!  I know it can be tough – I have been there, done that and I have a multitude of tee shirts!  The most important thing is to de-stress, keep up on your hygiene (mani-pedis are great), exercise, eat well, do things that make YOU feel pretty and sexy. Let’s be honest, when we feel tired, bloated, in pain, etc. it is tough to see the positives in others.  Taking care of yourself sets you up to focus and be present in the moment.

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Get educated. I don’t mean going back to school, who has time for that!  Have an open and honest conversation with your health care provider. You will be amazed at the things that affect your body and how excited we get with our partner.  Sometimes those feelings are the start of other health issues.

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Date your partner.  I’m not talking about the usual going out to dinner weekly to the same old place, the same old-time and the same bat channel! I mean schedule a time have fun with your partner! When was the last time that you locked the bedroom door and played a card game on the bed!  Or went to the park and played on the swings?

Communicate.  Communication is the number one key in a long-term relationship along with touch! No matter how well you know your partner you are NOT a mind reader. Despite the fact that many may think you are! Misunderstandings can lead to a lot of frustrations.  Learn to LISTEN while you are sharing your thoughts and ideas.

Try something new.  There are so many fun and exciting new things to add to your relationship just between the two of you. You can do something spontaneous like play hookie and head to the beach or lakeside for a couple of hours.  Stress causes us to get into a routine, a comfy spot – break out of that comfort zone!

Reflect.  Think about the things that were so thrilling and fun when you first got together! What were some things you did for your partner that they loved when you first started dating? Why not recreate those experiences?  If you don’t remember, have a conversation and ASK what they remember most about when you were first dating.  You may be surprised at the things that meant so much to them that you didn’t think about.

Take a vacation alone.  Isn’t the old saying “absence makes the hear grow fonder”?The truth is that alone time gives you time to reflect and regenerate your own energy. Gives you time to do self-care things without the judgement of someone else. It also interrupts the routine, “wakes you up” in a sense and you start to become aware of the things you love most about your partner, the things that make you feel incomplete without them.

See your partner at their BEST.  I can’t stress this one enough. If you are constantly frustrated with your partner or dreading being with them then try changing those thoughts. Make a list of everything you like and love about them and start paying attention to those things. In the morning say to yourself 3 new things you’re thankful for about them do this for at least 21 days and you’ll see a significant turn around!

What is your best tip for rekindle your relationship?  Share it with us.

Have a ThirtyOne-derful day!

 

Weigh to Goal

Self-Compassion

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“Be nice to yourself. It’s hard to be happy when someone is mean to you all the time.” ~Christine Arylo

It is the New Year and our first Tasty Tuesday and already I am changing things up.  Was one of YOUR New Year’s Resolutions to eat healthy

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Did your alarm go off and the first thing you thought of was yesterday’s failure to stick to the play.  Did Negative Nelly stop by to “beat you up”?  Do you feel that until  you reach the “optimal” number on the scale, that you will never be acceptable or lovable or enough?  I am here to tell you that is so not true….

Today is a NEW day and with it comes a NEW opportunity to eat healthy.  I struggle too.  In the evening is the toughest when I find myself mindlessly eating after tracking everything I put in my mouth during the day.

Do you know the ONE thing that made the most difference lately in my weightless journey?

Acknowledging that I’m human, allowing myself to be imperfect, treating myself kindly and gently when I stumble.  This is also a great foundation not just for healthy eating, but for living a happy life.

When I cease to beat myself up for “blowing it,” there is nothing for me to rebel against.  When I gave myself permission to be human and imperfect, there was no need to beat myself up anymore.  Self-compassion does not come easy for me.  It is something that I work at and practice daily.

Dr. Kristen Neff, the world’s foremost researcher and author on self-compassion defines self-compassion as three elements:

  • Mindfulness – noticing that you’re feeling badly, as if observing yourself from the outside
  • Common humanity – recognizing that stumbling, personal inadequacy, and suffering are part of the shared human experience
  • Self-kindness – being gentle and loving with yourself, as you would a beloved friend

I have struggled with the NEW Weight Watcher’s program.  NOT because it is hard or  restrictive.  I have struggled because it is about change.  Change in the way that I think about certain foods.  I mean I lost 108 pounds on the old plan, why do anything different, right?  The truth is that I see why I am stuck.  I see the things that have sabotaged my weight loss.  Actually, this is the BEST WW program yet.  I am more aware of the hidden sugars.  I am more aware of eating clean so less processed foods.  I actually have to think before I pick something to eat instead of mindlessly eating things that are fat free or diet.

The greatest gift in this new journey is learning to practice self-compassion.

What’s something you’ve been frustrated with yourself about this week? Can you try practicing self-compassion with that? If it were your dearest friend, instead of you, how would you respond to her? Try turning that kind and loving voice on yourself and see what happens. And remember, practicing self-compassion takes practice, so if it’s hard for you, be self-compassionate!

Have a ThirtyOne-derful day!

 

Hope Wissel

Celebrate Negativity

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Are you struggling with your direct sales business?  Are parties becoming more difficult to book?  Do you feel like you are tapping the same people all the time?

As a result, are you frustrated, or having self-doubt, discouraged or maybe even a little depressed?  Have you resorted to comparing yourself to others?  Maybe you have said “I am just not good at sales” or “I guess I picked the wrong company”.

The truth is that your negative thoughts are affecting your ability to communicate clearly.  Those same thoughts affect your motivation, your perspective, your ability share (not sell) or even notice when there is an unexpected opportunity.

Negativity takes many forms.  For those of us in direct sales who rely on our people skills to build our business – our state of mind is directly proportional to our results.

I know, saying “eliminate negativity” is sometimes easier said then done, right?

Think about the times you feel positive.  You are optimistic.  You have clarity and can see your vision (or why).  You enthusiastically interact with others.  Best of all, you’re in a much better place to influence and lead others.  So monitoring your emotional state is one of the keys to success for many with a home based businesses.

I have just spent a week “celebrating” my anger/frstration.  I know crazy, right?  It was an exercise from abundance coach Eryka Peskin.  By celebrating our anger and frustrations, we gain a clue to our desires.   That was powerful for me.  Our anger (and negativity) is often triggered when our desires aren’t met…or when they’re actively disregarded or devalued. If you’re angry (or negative) about something, it’s a great opportunity to explore it and figure out EXACTLY which of your desires aren’t being met..AND what you can do to change that.

So, when you are experiencing negativity – STOP and name the type of negativity you’re experiencing.  Is it fear, judgment, impatience, etc.?  This is the hardest part because we are usually so caught in what provoked our feelings that we can’t see anything else.

Now that you have recognized it, what made you negative?  Identify the desire that you wanted.  Was it more income, more girl time, to have me time, etc?  What was your desire that was not met?  State your desire!

Next is to “Have compassion for yourself and that you experiencing this”.  Don’t judge yourself for being negative!  By judging yourself, it will only make it harder to move forward and take some positive steps.

Celebrate the negativity, identify the desire and make a plan to reach that desire.  Give yourself a mental hug. Or get someone to give you a hug. Or both!  Take a few deep breaths and relax.

When you replace the negative thoughts with a clear vision of  your desire, it will be natural to stay positive.  There may be some side effects of the negative feelings so you will need to focus on the new vision.

This simple formula of celebrating the negativity so that you can identity your desires has helped me to get back on track.  Maintaining a positive attitude will allow you to function at a higher level of effectiveness in your business.

Here is an example:  I celebrate that I am disappointed in my sales and bookings for the last few months.  I have a desire for a successful business and to do that, I desire structure that allows me to connect with people.

Celebrate your negativity today along with YOUR desire – share them with us!

Have a ThirtyOne-derful day!