Hope Inspires, Hope Wissel, Recovery

A Celebration With Reflection


The month of May is filled with lots of celebrations.  We go from my birthday, to Mother’s Day, to our wedding anniversary to my anniversary in recovery!  This year, each one has brought a realization of how blessed I am to have been given a second chance.  

A second chance to become the person God intended for me to be.  A chance to grow, to learn to like myself and to embrace the here and now.  A chance to have strong healthy relationships with the important people in my life.  A second chance at life!

WE HAVE 4 YEARS!  Four years ago, I was a hot mess on the verge of losing my hubby with a mound of credit card debt.  I had a victim mentality while I isolated feeling less than everyone else.  I was broken emotionally, mentally and spiritually.  Appearing confident (often cocky) on the outside while hiding a scared child on the inside.  I had walked this road before and relapse is now a part of my story.  I let down my family, my friends but most of all I let myself down.  The strong confident person was gone.  What was left was a broken, shell of my former self.  Sadly, I didn’t notice it – I thought I hid it well.  I blamed everyone else for what was wrong in my life when the only one who was to blame was me.

Four years later, I am blessed.  I have a new sponsor, a new home group, I am working the steps and I attend meetings regularly. Today, the credit card debt is paid off.  Today, I have a local network of women in recovery.  Today, I accept I am an introvert but it does not mean I need to isolate.  In fact stepping out of my comfort zone is important.  Today, I know my ride & die gals who were with me the first night 4 years ago are just a phone call away.  Just for today, I like myself.  Today, I don’t beat myself up over the “stuck number on the scale” or how I think “I should look”.  Today, I don’t apologize for things I have no control over.  Today, I set boundaries so I can maintain my mental health.  Today, I willing seek out guidance from others who have walked this road before me.  I know if I don’t put my recovery first, I will not continue to have the blessed life I live today.  

Yes, MS kicks my butt BUT it is not an excuse to go back to those old destructive behaviors.  Living life on life’s terms is not always easy but WE do recovery together.  The program works when I am willing to work the steps, am open-minded, willing to listen to suggestions AND am honest with myself and others.  

Some days, I am unable to feel anything but sadness (MS seems to play with my emotions as it takes my memories).  I struggle to remember how bad it was.  Not just this time but the first time (my first clean date was 10/26/91).  Hubby often says, God took the memories because it was too unbearable for me to remember.  God continues to give me glimpses but when it becomes too overwhelming, they quickly fade.  So instead of struggling to remember, I try each day to be a better person than I was yesterday. Does it always work? NOPE!  I know with God’s help, it will.  I continue to go to meetings – I need to hear the struggles, I need to share my blind faith, I need to be surrounded by people who have been where I have been and I need to remember  “never” should not be part of my vocabulary.  

JUST FOR TODAY: My strongest desire is to have a spiritual awakening.  I will watch for its symptoms and rejoice when I discover them.

Thank you to everyone who has walked these many roads with us.  We are grateful for the part you have played and continued to play in our lives.

Have an Epic day!

 

Hope Wissel, Unclutter Your Life

Finding My Purpose

We have been home from an amazing vacation for a few days and are adjusting to the cold weather.  UGH!  I do like the change of seasons BUT I am NOT a fan of cold weather. Sunshine definitely helps me to clear my head and is good for my MS.

My word for this year is ACCEPTANCE so let’s recap the first month. January was full of playing the comparison game especially in my business.  I have been digging deep to find  my “why” and as of today, it is still not clear.  To say the least, I have been beating myself up a little.  After 11 years, you would think I would be jumping on the bandwagon to kickstart my business in the new year with excitement, yet I can’t seem to find it.   Acceptance for me is about living in the moment, being grateful for the gifts God has given me and trying NOT to fix, manage and control things.  I can say I ended January with a win.  🥰  As we got ready to go on our road trip, the weather on the southern track was getting bad (an ice storm was coming to SC, NC & GA).  So, we changed plans.  Left a day early, drove longer than we originally planned, rescheduled hotel reservations & beat the storm.  In the past, I would have been a hot mess but with God’s help, we were blessed with safe travels and an amazing week.

I know…. what does all of this have to do with finding my purpose, right?  I was able to unplug in the hopes of finding my purpose.  I was able to stop and enjoy the beauty of God’s creation.

I have been thinking about “What is my MAIN reason for my business?”  Believe it or not, it has become just a way “to make some extra money”.  No it hasn’t always been the  FIRST thing on my list.  Crazy, right?  It has always been to make a difference then it was about the money.  How the money can help me to make a difference.  Through working the steps in my recovery, I have been learning about me. I still want to make a difference in the lives of people but I’m not sure what it actually looks like.

 

Here are some ideas from the Direct Sales Education Foundation on Finding YOUR Purpose

  • Listen to your inner voice and hold off on asking others what they think. Before you start seeking opinions on what your purpose should be, tune into your inner voice for inspiration.  Once you have a definitive idea, then it’s time to gather opinions from others.  As a people pleaser, I struggle with this one.  I don’t want to disappoint people.
  • Follow what is exciting, not what is easy. In business, just as in life, the easy choice may not always be the best one.   WOW!  This is so true.  The grass may not always be greener on the other side.  If you are excited about your choice, you are then willing to do the work!
  • Tap into your instincts and emotions rather than logic. You obviously don’t want to ignore logic completely, but when finding the purpose for your business (or in your life), your instincts should take over. Instincts and emotions are powerful enough to guide us to do great things. When faced with a difficult question or decision, listen carefully to your initial gut reaction. This does not mean to act impulsively, but rather to let gut feelings lead the way on your journey.  For many hard-working and ambitious people, this is not always the easiest thing to do, but it certainly is important if you want to find your true purpose which drives you toward success.

I was never out to change the world, some may say the results of my work does it but it was never my purpose.  As a Social Worker, I wanted to help people improve the quality of their life – no matter how small a change it was for them.  As I look to work my businesses this year, I want to make a difference – one smile at a time.  The end result will be success in my business and in life while helping others get what they want.

What have you done to find your purpose? Would you add to our list? Please share your ideas in the comments section below!

Have a blessed 💝  day!

 

Recovery, Relax, Reflect, Recharge, Unclutter Your Life

Do You Believe?

I dedicate today’s blog to all of those who doubt themselves, who beat themselves up over past mistakes, who think they are inferior, or who think they will never succeed.  

January has been an interesting month for me…. trying to find my passion again, setting goals than changing them, doubting myself, waiting for answers to prayers, and working on my 4th & 5th steps….Living life on life’s terms can be rough.

I want you to know you are not alone, we are in this journey together.  I’m back to sharing my strengths, hopes and experiences a few times per month.  I want you to remember together we can heal and become the AMAZING women God wants us to be.  It won’t always be easy.  It probably won’t be in our time – God works on his schedule not ours.  But the important thing is – we do heal!

I am grateful for the struggles because from them I grow.  I am grateful for my faith which keeps me grounded even on the toughest days.  I am learning so much about myself lately and I have to admit – it can be pretty scary!  It has mw wondering (and sometimes doubting) all kinds of things.  I know the road may be bumpy but the end result is to be a better person tomorrow than I am today.  You don’t have to have lofty goals or dreams.  You don’t have to make changes immediately.  Remember slow and steady wins the race.  The key is to listen to those God nudges (or smacks on the head for me sometimes).  Trust and believe.  

This is a repost from gobigcoach:

I believe in you,

Even when you don’t.

I know you are a miracle,

Even when you forget.

I am thankful for YOUR extraordinary,

Even when you feel like you’re not enough.

Whatever you struggle with,

I know you can survive…

And prevail!

Whatever you resist,

I know you can allow…

Harmoniously.

Whatever you dream,

I know you can experience…

And expand into even more.

Whenever you fall and wonder if you

can get up again…

Remember, I believe in you – even when you don’t.

Don’t let fear and doubt steal the joys of each day.  You are an amazing individual with gifts and talents to share with the world! You ARE extraordinary!

Have an Epic day!

 

Hope Wissel

Reflecting on 2021

A new year………….

I’m not sure what happened to 2021.  LOL.  I actually had to flip through my planner to see what went on.  The memory is not what it used to be.  It seemed to pass in the blink of an eye.

We spent the year working on the house – our forever home.  Not a lot needed to be done but it is those little things that catch you off guard.  Lots of outside projects got done.  I’m looking forward to our first “crop” of fresh garlic which should be ready in the spring.  Who knew growing garlic could happen outside in the winter????  We shall see.

The MS life seems to be changing again.  There have been more “mini” MS flare ups – foggy brain, unable to process thoughts along with the tingling in my fingers.  I have resigned myself to wearing my brace more often when I am out and about.  I have to also be careful NOT to overwhelm myself with trying to do lots of things – the realization came after spending a week prepping for Thanksgiving only to have a meltdown and having to take it easy for the rest of the weekend.  Not too bad since I got to fur-baby sit.  I’m learning new things like: my mind is often “blank” so I spend more time in quiet instead of trying to carry on conversations.  Emotions blindside me – out of nowhere there are tears or smiles.

With 3 1/2+ years in recovery, I am feeling better about me.  Most days I even like me despite the fact I am struggling to get back to goal weight.  Life on life’s terms is not always easy but I’m grateful I found an amazing home group, a new sponsor and attend meetings regularly.  Lunchtime meetings work great for this old lady.  LOL. ❤  Working through the steps has been eye opener.  God has allowed me remember things (in tiny pieces) – in his time not mine when he knows I am ready to face things.

My side hustle as a bag lady is going strong. I’m grateful for the wonderful people it has brought into my life – customers and hostesses who I am blessed to now call friends.   I am venturing out in the “food” world.  Good food, fast and easy with the ability to tweak the recipes to count my WW points.  I love sharing new recipes along with the #epiclife.  Of course, having a bigger kitchen has helped because now I actually ENJOY cooking again.   I have also been working on new angel designs for the Spring craft season and can’t wait to share them.  They will probably show up on the Etsy site soon.

I will admit, I still get stuck in my head with the “woulda, coulda, shoulda” or the comparison game.  I’m learning one day at a time to enjoy the moment and know the only person I should be comparing myself to is me, the day before.  My basic goal is to just be a better person today than I was yesterday.

Over the last 10 years, I have picked a word – a theme to the year.  Last year’s word was GRATITUDE!  Gratitude is defined as “the quality of being thankful; readiness to show appreciation for and to return kindness.“.  I learned to practice gratitude every night or at least I tried to.  It was easy to have gratitude for the good things but a struggle during the challenges of the year.  I know through the challenges, I learn and grow, for that I am grateful.

Finding a word for this year was a little tougher than I thought it would be.  No matter how hard I have tried to avoid it “acceptance” keeps popping up. So I guess I better take the God wink as a sign….. ACCEPTANCE is defined as “the action of consenting to receive something offered or being received as adequate or suitable“. Dictionary definitions sometimes baffle me.  I hate when they use part of the word in the definition.  Grateful, I found an article while I was looking for a definition called “The 5 Things Everyone Should  Know About Acceptance“.  These words stood out for me:

Acceptance doesn’t mean you can’t work on changing things.

Okay, I got the message!   LOL.  Guess there will be a lot of posts on this topic because I don’t think I am the only one who struggles with it!  Change is something I tend to struggle with when it comes quickly, my brain doesn’t adjust easily.  BUT change over time is a whole lot easier.

What will your world for this year be?  Share it with us…Best wishes for a safe healthy and happy New Year from our house to yours!

Hope Inspires, Hope Wissel, Unclutter Your Life

What is Your Recipe for Life?

The last two weeks have been an emotional roller coaster.  Our sweet Baby (fur baby) is nearing the end of her life because of a tumor. Father’s Day causes me to stress because I’ve lost so many memories. Hubby’s pain levels have been higher than normal. Restless nights so my sleep is off.
All of these things tend to leave me feeling drained.  I am by no means complaining, but I guess it sounds like it, right?  LOL.  I will admit, I have found myself on the “pity pot” several times this week which leads to resentments which is never good for this recovering addict.
It always amazes me how listening to a business training call can change my entire mindset.  The topic was “power hour” and I was ready to just mindlessly listen when the importance of changing our mindset was mentioned…. Not only does this apply to business but also in our everyday lives, especially during those woe is me days.  Then while reading my Just for Today… it was all about surrendering. Do you think God is trying to send me a message?
When I was in rehab, I remember a saying something like: If one person calls you a duck – you can toss it aside, if two people call you a duck – it deserves some consideration but if three people call you a duck – you MUST be a duck!”  I am not waiting for the third person because I know I need to change my mindset and get off the pity pot!
So starting this morning, this duck is changing her mindset.  Do you need to change your mindset?
Here are a few questions you can answer which might help:
  1. Identify what happened to cause the change
  2. Why did it happen
  3. How can I use this for my personal growth
  4. What changes can I make to improve in the future
  5. Where can I find help or who can help
This “recipe for life” was part of a devotion I was reading.  Maybe this will help you in changing your mindset or counting your blessings:
Begin with a case of Joy
Add a heaping spoonful of Gratitude
Fold in a large dollop of Kindness
Stir in a handful of Forgiveness
Sprinkle liberally with Love and cover with Peace
Always serve with a large side of Faith
(Author unknown)
 
What do you do to change your mindset or get off the “pity pot”? Maybe you take a walk and count your blessings.  Maybe you do a gratitude list.  Maybe you put on some music and dance around.  Share your best tip with us!  Have a ThirtyOne-derful day!