One Word Not a Resolution

It’s that time of year, reflection on the year past and looking forward to the year ahead.  I haven’t been blogging much, because I honestly didn’t feel like I had much to say….that is constantly changing so let’s talk about RESOLUTIONS!

New Year’s Eve is right around the corner… some are at work eagerly anticipating another day or two off.  Others are eagerly preparing for the festivities or maybe even starting to celebrate.  Somewhere in the midst of all of the craziness, there is always the talk of New Year’s Resolutions, right?  Most pick a resolution by a problem that has plagued them (sometimes for years) and vow to change it.  How has that worked for you?

Doing away with resolutions and embracing ONE WORD began in 2013 for me when my then DS Director challenged us to pick a word….

My 2013 word was FAITH:  Faith to believe when the way is rough and faith to hang on when the going is tough will never fail to pull us through and bring us strength and comfort too. Helen Steiner Rice. “And Jesus said unto them, Because of your unbelief: for verily I say unto you, If ye have faith as a grain of mustard seed, ye shall say unto this mountain, Remove hence to yonder place; and it shall remove; and nothing shall be impossible unto you.” Matthew 17:20

FAITH helped me when business was slow.  FAITH helped me to step outside my comfort zone.  FAITH helped me to stay on track with Weight Watchers.  FAITH helped me to overcome the doubt and fear.  FAITH got me through as Rob suffered congestive heart failure.  FAITH got me through when fear gripped my heart at the thought that I might lose him.  FAITH kept me calm as I overcame my fear of dentists.  My FAITH grew each day as I sought God’s guidance before I made major decisions in my personal and business life.

Over the next 10 years, here were my words:

2014 – EMRACE

2015 – CONFIDENCE

2016 – ACCOUNTABLE

2017 – INTENTIONAL

2018 – COURAGE

2019 – GRATITUDE

2022 – ACCEPTANCE

For 2020 and 2021, I can’t remember what they were and I can’t figure out my posts.  It was life during COVID and moving to our forever house.

This “One Word” experiment moved me from the long list of changes to ONE WORD.  It helped me to take all my big plans, narrow them down into a single focus and create a vision.   When things got tough, when Doubtful Debbie and Negative Nellie visited; I went back to my ONE WORD and gained focus.  It wasn’t always easy but it helped me.  Notice I didn’t say resolutions, I said goals.  I am prayed on my word for 2023 and God has nudged me in the direction I need to go.  That ONE word will be my guide in my personal, and business life.

 

My word for 2023 is ABUNDANCE!

Abundance is defined as an appreciation of life in its fullness, joy and strength of mind, body and soul.

As 2023 kicks off with some health challenges, I will embrace a healthy mindset, practicing gratitude in EVERY situation.  I know everything we go through is a blessing – a gift in one form or another.  I have learned over the last 6 months about living abundantly.  I have been blessed with a tribe of women who think and act abundantly.  I have been blessed with Coach Ann being a part of my life – professionally and personally.  She has taught me (and many others) that these things will kill abundance in my life: playing the victim, negativity, having a pity party, making excuses and blaming others.  I will continue to eliminate these things in my life in 2023 so that I can live abundantly and share my abundance with those in my life!

What is your ONE WORD for 2023?  Or are you still in the “resolution list” mode?  Either way, share them with us.

Have a blessed day!

Do You Manifest Abundance?

Before I could answer this question, I had to totally understand what “manifesting abundance” meant.  I thought it was simply having a positive attitude which most days I do BUT it is so much more.

By definition “Manifestation is the ability to consciously create your reality by focusing on the power of your thoughts. It’s about being able to materialize things you think about, feel into or believe. Abundance is about a lot more than money. It’s joy.”

So, let me ask you again….do you manifest abundance?  Now, I would have to honestly answer – NO! or at least not 100% of the time or in all areas of my life.  I know you are probably wondering what started me on this quest to “manifest abundance”, right?  I have been following an AMAZING social media coach Ann Evanston who manifests abundance in ALL areas of her life.  She has inspired me.  She reinforced many of the same ideals given to me in the past by some other amazing women.  The Law of Abundance, along with branding myself and not my company are TWO of the big ones.

“Believe It Until You Achieve It,” or the “Fake it Until You Make It” theory…..

Belief is the central pillar to the idea of manifesting abundance. What is the thing that keeps you from achieving something???? Lack of faith in yourself, your abilities, and your dedication.  How many of you despite your positive attitude are hit with the “negative” inner gremlins on occasion.  Maybe those scarcity words have become part of your vocabulary.  I am learning those negative comments like “I don’t have enough right now” or “the budget is tight” or any of hundred of other similar comments are scarcity mode.  Funny, how I can have positive thoughts in some areas of my life but the scarcity gremlins creep in when I least expect them.  I always wondered if stating the fact of a limited budget or budget is tight or anything like that affect my business.  The answer is YES!  These simple statements have a resounding effect because they are no longer hopeful, positive or expecting the best in my life.

 

Believing is having the ability to dream which leads to achieving.  It may seem like a short road between believing and achieving but it requires effort, patience and a process.  No, simply imagining things doesn’t make them come true. Those visual are nota magic wand!  You need to show up consistently and keep going when the going gets tough. Your belief can only motivate you THEN you need to put the energy into an outcome-driven process.

The “fake it to you make it” theory helped me in my career as a social worker.  There were many times, I showed I was confident when I was definitely not feeling it 100%.  The end result was within a short period of time I was where I wanted to be in my career.  Was it easy? NO! Did I work countless hours to reach my goal? YES! I was consistent and it paid off.

I am working on “manifesting statements” or “positive affirmations” which will help me move out of the scarcity mode in ALL areas of my life.  I am going to finally stomp those negative inner gremlins, so I can live the abundant life I was meant to live.  What are some of your positive affirmations to manifest abundance?

Which of these abundance affirmations radiate with you?

1. 1. I experience wealth as a key part of my life.
   2. I am capable of overcoming any money-obstacles that stand in my way.
   3. I can conquer my money goals.
   4. Today I commit to living my financial dreams.
   5. I want more money. And that’s okay.
   6. It’s easy and natural for me to be prosperous and successful.
   7. My life is filled with health and wealth.
   8. Abundance is coming, I deserve and accept it.
   9. I accept and receive unexpected money.
   10. I accept and receive unexpected prosperity.
   11. I have more than enough money.
   12. I deserve to make more money.
   13. I am always discovering new sources of income.
   14. Money comes my way in both expected and unexpected ways.
   15. I am open to receiving all wealth life brings to me.
   16. I’m not poor, I’m just low wealth right now. That is changing.
   17. I’m getting out of my own way when it comes to money.

The ones I highlighted are the ones that speak to me.  I truly believe by speaking health into my life, I have been able to manage my MS on a holistic basis.  I know it is not for everyone BUT for me, it works.  Do I still have bad days?  YES! The difference is, I don’t let a bad day determine my week, or month or year.  I count my blessings and move forward because even a bad MS day is a blessing.

What is the quickest way to manifest abundance?

1. Practice gratitude and generosity right now. Manifesting isn’t just about “getting” whatever you want. …
2. Be present. …
3. Be open to receiving. …
4. Stay positive. …
5. Take time to meditate.

Who will join me on this journey?  Let’s cheer each other on.  Have an Epic day!

What is Your Recipe for Life?

The month of May was busy with celebrations and A LOT of reflecting on the past.  Hitting the milestone of 65 and celebrating 4 years was HUGE for me.  I am amazed at how much my mindset has changed over the last 3 years…

On the days I least expect it, I am reminded of the importance of changing your mindset in all areas of your life especially during those woe is me days.  You know, the days we sit on the “pity pot” focusing on the negative instead of counting our blessings.  These kind of days are fewer and far between since I have been working on the steps and me.  They still come but today I have tools to keep them from lasting too long.

It is usually someone around me who notices the negative mindset or the “attitude” long before I do.  Today, I very seldom wait for the third duck before I start looking at whether or not I need to change my mindset.  Let me explain…When I was in rehab back in 1991 (yup this is one thing that has always stuck with me), I remember a saying something like this: If one person calls you a duck – you can toss it aside, if two people call you a duck – it deserves some consideration but if three people call you a duck – you MUST be a duck!”  Have you ever heard this?

Do you need to change your mindset? Do you need to train your brain  to think positively?  Here are a few tips to help you:

• Believe in yourself – remind yourself daily how awesome you are.
• Empower yourself – remind yourself you always have choices.
• Believe in the impossible – remind yourself anything is possible.
• Look for the good – remind yourself to reframe situations using the tools above.

I will admit, this is a struggle for me some days when new situations trigger old memories, the old behaviors want to come out.  I am learning to STOP 🛑 for a moment, usually saying the Serenity Prayer and then move forward.  I look at how far I have come and remember, feelings pass unless I want to hold on to them and dwell in the muck.

Focusing on the good things in my life and practicing gratitude is a big help.  Surrounding myself with positive people instead of the Negative Nellies is key too.  Maybe this will help you in changing your mindset or counting your blessings:

Begin with a case of Joy

Add a heaping spoonful of Gratitude

Fold in a large dollop of Kindness

Stir in a handful of Forgiveness

Sprinkle liberally with Love and cover with Peace

Always serve with a large side of Faith

(Author unknown)

 

What is your recipe for life?  Have an Epic day!

A Celebration With Reflection

The month of May is filled with lots of celebrations.  We go from my birthday, to Mother’s Day, to our wedding anniversary to my anniversary in recovery!  This year, each one has brought a realization of how blessed I am to have been given a second chance.  

A second chance to become the person God intended for me to be.  A chance to grow, to learn to like myself and to embrace the here and now.  A chance to have strong healthy relationships with the important people in my life.  A second chance at life!

WE HAVE 4 YEARS!  Four years ago, I was a hot mess on the verge of losing my hubby with a mound of credit card debt.  I had a victim mentality while I isolated feeling less than everyone else.  I was broken emotionally, mentally and spiritually.  Appearing confident (often cocky) on the outside while hiding a scared child on the inside.  I had walked this road before and relapse is now a part of my story.  I let down my family, my friends but most of all I let myself down.  The strong confident person was gone.  What was left was a broken, shell of my former self.  Sadly, I didn’t notice it – I thought I hid it well.  I blamed everyone else for what was wrong in my life when the only one who was to blame was me.

Four years later, I am blessed.  I have a new sponsor, a new home group, I am working the steps and I attend meetings regularly. Today, the credit card debt is paid off.  Today, I have a local network of women in recovery.  Today, I accept I am an introvert but it does not mean I need to isolate.  In fact stepping out of my comfort zone is important.  Today, I know my ride & die gals who were with me the first night 4 years ago are just a phone call away.  Just for today, I like myself.  Today, I don’t beat myself up over the “stuck number on the scale” or how I think “I should look”.  Today, I don’t apologize for things I have no control over.  Today, I set boundaries so I can maintain my mental health.  Today, I willing seek out guidance from others who have walked this road before me.  I know if I don’t put my recovery first, I will not continue to have the blessed life I live today.  

Yes, MS kicks my butt BUT it is not an excuse to go back to those old destructive behaviors.  Living life on life’s terms is not always easy but WE do recovery together.  The program works when I am willing to work the steps, am open-minded, willing to listen to suggestions AND am honest with myself and others.  

Some days, I am unable to feel anything but sadness (MS seems to play with my emotions as it takes my memories).  I struggle to remember how bad it was.  Not just this time but the first time (my first clean date was 10/26/91).  Hubby often says, God took the memories because it was too unbearable for me to remember.  God continues to give me glimpses but when it becomes too overwhelming, they quickly fade.  So instead of struggling to remember, I try each day to be a better person than I was yesterday. Does it always work? NOPE!  I know with God’s help, it will.  I continue to go to meetings – I need to hear the struggles, I need to share my blind faith, I need to be surrounded by people who have been where I have been and I need to remember  “never” should not be part of my vocabulary.  

JUST FOR TODAY: My strongest desire is to have a spiritual awakening.  I will watch for its symptoms and rejoice when I discover them.

Thank you to everyone who has walked these many roads with us.  We are grateful for the part you have played and continued to play in our lives.

Have an Epic day!

 

Finding My Purpose

We have been home from an amazing vacation for a few days and are adjusting to the cold weather.  UGH!  I do like the change of seasons BUT I am NOT a fan of cold weather. Sunshine definitely helps me to clear my head and is good for my MS.

My word for this year is ACCEPTANCE so let’s recap the first month. January was full of playing the comparison game especially in my business.  I have been digging deep to find  my “why” and as of today, it is still not clear.  To say the least, I have been beating myself up a little.  After 11 years, you would think I would be jumping on the bandwagon to kickstart my business in the new year with excitement, yet I can’t seem to find it.   Acceptance for me is about living in the moment, being grateful for the gifts God has given me and trying NOT to fix, manage and control things.  I can say I ended January with a win.    As we got ready to go on our road trip, the weather on the southern track was getting bad (an ice storm was coming to SC, NC & GA).  So, we changed plans.  Left a day early, drove longer than we originally planned, rescheduled hotel reservations & beat the storm.  In the past, I would have been a hot mess but with God’s help, we were blessed with safe travels and an amazing week.

I know…. what does all of this have to do with finding my purpose, right?  I was able to unplug in the hopes of finding my purpose.  I was able to stop and enjoy the beauty of God’s creation.

I have been thinking about “What is my MAIN reason for my business?”  Believe it or not, it has become just a way “to make some extra money”.  No it hasn’t always been the  FIRST thing on my list.  Crazy, right?  It has always been to make a difference then it was about the money.  How the money can help me to make a difference.  Through working the steps in my recovery, I have been learning about me. I still want to make a difference in the lives of people but I’m not sure what it actually looks like.

 

Here are some ideas from the Direct Sales Education Foundation on “Finding YOUR Purpose“

• Listen to your inner voice and hold off on asking others what they think. Before you start seeking opinions on what your purpose should be, tune into your inner voice for inspiration.  Once you have a definitive idea, then it’s time to gather opinions from others.  As a people pleaser, I struggle with this one.  I don’t want to disappoint people.

• Follow what is exciting, not what is easy. In business, just as in life, the easy choice may not always be the best one.   WOW!  This is so true.  The grass may not always be greener on the other side.  If you are excited about your choice, you are then willing to do the work!

• Tap into your instincts and emotions rather than logic. You obviously don’t want to ignore logic completely, but when finding the purpose for your business (or in your life), your instincts should take over. Instincts and emotions are powerful enough to guide us to do great things. When faced with a difficult question or decision, listen carefully to your initial gut reaction. This does not mean to act impulsively, but rather to let gut feelings lead the way on your journey.  For many hard-working and ambitious people, this is not always the easiest thing to do, but it certainly is important if you want to find your true purpose which drives you toward success.

I was never out to change the world, some may say the results of my work does it but it was never my purpose.  As a Social Worker, I wanted to help people improve the quality of their life – no matter how small a change it was for them.  As I look to work my businesses this year, I want to make a difference – one smile at a time.  The end result will be success in my business and in life while helping others get what they want.

What have you done to find your purpose? Would you add to our list? Please share your ideas in the comments section below!

Have a blessed  day!