#TBT: Bullying – The Visible vs the Invisible

I can hardly believe it has been 6 years since I started this blog.  For those of you who don’t know, it was started as a result of a challenge by Vanessa Coppes as a way to grow my business.

For those of you who have ever thought about blogging – do it!  It hasn’t just been good for my business but it has been good for my soul.  Sharing my strength, hope and experience with others has been amazing.  I’m not sure what the future holds for my when it comes to blogging since my MS plays havoc on processing thoughts BUT I will continue in some way!

So, as I celebrate heading into year number 7, here is a throwback to my very first post:

I wanted to share how “bullying” can be hidden by our children. It doesn’t mean you are a bad parent, it just means you may have taught your child coping skills to help deal with the bullying from school mates. Bear with me as I share some background information..

I was a single mom for 14 years who worked full-time trying to provide all of the things I had when I was growing up and give my daughter, Belinda, more. Isn’t it every parent’s wish – to give their child more?  We lived in a double wide trailer in a trailer park in an area with a good school district, lots of children my daughter’s age and affordable.  My daughter was involved in a lot of activities outside of school – first competitive gymnastics, then field hockey then all-star cheering. This was my way of making sure Belinda stayed away from the “wrong crowd”. She went to public school until she was a Sophomore in HS when she asked to change to a private Christian school where our Pastor’s family taught and went to school. Her reasons made sense so we juggled the budget and Belinda graduated from Pilgrim Academy – smiling, happy, ready for college & still living in the trailer park. Belinda traveled 13 hours to go college – Western Carolina University. I was heart-broken she was so far away but after the first semester, she excelled – graduated with honors in the Honors College program.

It was then, the “clueless mom” found out what had really been happening…My daughter is a social worker who loves working with troubled kids (she now works for the State helping disabled individuals). As she was preparing her applications for grad school for her Masters in Macro-Social Work, she had to write some essays as to why she felt she would belonged in this field. Since I am a grant-writer, she asked me to review her essays (like she usually did) to check grammar, etc. This is when I found out the “horror” of my daughter’s school years….

Belinda recounts many tales of verbal abuse from school mates because we lived in a trailer park which as the years passed became like the “projects” of the Township. She only invited her closest friends back to our house for sleep overs, parties, etc. I never really thought about it since I was working, juggling her activities and making sure her homework was done. The truth was very few parents wanted their children to come over because of where we lived – not necessarily our home but the neighborhood. Belinda talked about how people used to call her “trailer trash”. The outside sports activities along with my example of what a strong woman could do is what she attributes to her success. Some called her a “snob” because she was involved in outside sports.  Then when she became active in church, more verbal abuse came.  Some of her friends from the trailer park fell into the lives people expected – sexually active, lots of unsupervised parties, drugs, alcohol and more. I was blessed, Belinda didn’t head in that direction. 

Many believe if I was clueless about the verbal abuse, I would be clueless about everything else…My daughter and I had and still have an amazing relationship. When I asked her why she never told me, her response “I didn’t want to hurt you because I knew you were doing the best you could. The material things didn’t matter because you were always there for me”. My daughter has amazing attributes – self confidence, speaks her mind (sometimes without tack) and is forever looking to help the underserved youth in her community.  She tells me on a regular basis how she hopes to accomplish all I have both professionally and personally. 

I wanted to share this to let people know bullying isn’t always visible, it can happen to any child. As I travel back to our old hometown, I look around and ask my husband – was I “clueless” about what life was like. His response is always the same – “You did what you had to do to make sure Belinda had everything she needed even if it wasn’t always what she wanted. As a result, she is a bright, intelligent and confident woman who wants to take on the world to make it a better place”.

Since signing up to be a part of the Family Wellness & Beauty Day for Kickin’ It Kids AntiBullying, God has pressed on my heart to share this story. 

I know this was a a LONG post but it will always be a part of my story.

Have a ThirtyOne-derful day!

Organizing on a Shoestring

I love finding simply solutions to those messes in our home which make us crazy.  Pinterest is full of them.  Of course, I get lost in the never ending black hole of liking and saving posts.  Yes, I will dream of doing some of them when the truth is, it will never happen most of the time.  What about you?  Have your tried some of the AWESOME things on Pinterest only to have an epic fail?

Here are some tips I HAVE tried…….

• Wet gloves or Mittens creating a mess?  Why not put up a retractable clothes line in your utility room or your mudroom wall or in the bathroom.  Have some clothes pins handy for hanging them up.  Put it down low enough so the kids can hang wet mittens and gloves to dry overnight.

• Do you find coins in the washer?  Does your hubby leave change all over the table or dresser?  Get rid of those tiny piles of coins by saving in style. Get a designer piggy bank to keep it wherever you’d like to dump your change. OR use a Thirty One Zipper Pouch

     

• Edit your hangers. Wire hangers make me crazy.  They bend easily so we are an all plastic house.  Pick a style which works best for you – wire, plastic or wood and unify the hangers in every closet.  If you use plastic, how about a different color for each person in the house.  Makes putting clothes away so much easier.
• Use pillboxes to stash your earrings and rings when traveling.  Pick them up at the dollar store. Another alternative is Thirty One’s Shine On Jewelry Case.

• Use a wall-mounted broom and mop holder, or tie ribbon loops on the end of poles and hang them from hooks in your closet, garage or utility closet.

• Make a party kit. Do you have items you just use for parties or holidays?  Are they taking up valuable space in your cabinets?  Do you spend endless hours searching for things when you are ready to party?  Stash napkins, extra glassware and plates, votive candles and holders, extra vases, cocktail picks and other necessities in an old wine crate or a ThirtyOne Deluxe Utility Tote. You can pull it out pre-party or pre-holiday entertaining so you don’t waste valuable cupboard space or time.

• Are medical records becoming overwhelming?  Use a binder to store all medical records and information for everyone in your family, including each pet. Use dividers for each family member and include plastic pouches or expandable pockets to contain receipts and tiny record cards.

• Stash awkward, easy-to-misplace necessities (extra hairbrushes, lint roller) in decorative reusable tote bags. Hang them off a doorknob in every room. Try Thirty One’s Hanging Traveler’s Case.

• Store photos in archival-quality, acid-free boxes until you have time to organize them in albums.

• Place your shredder where you intercept daily mail. If that’s the kitchen, so be it.  This is one way to eliminate piles of “to be shredded”

• Put a small plastic caddy, like Thirty One’s Swap it Pocket, in your gym bag so you can manage hair care and skincare products without dropping anything.

• Stop losing lock combinations and computer passwords once and for all. Jot everyone’s codes and combinations down in a notebook and store it in your family’s fireproof lockbox.

• Always keep one cute, foldable shopping tote in each of your heavy-rotation purses so you’re never caught without. Try Thirty One’s Essential Storage Tote…

• Get a gift-wrap organizer and stock up on a year’s worth of wrap and ribbons, or ready-to-fill bags and tissue. Try Thirty One’s Stand Tall Bin to keep role of wrap organized.  Guess what?  It is on sale in April for just $15 with a $35 purchase.

Finally, plan a closet cleanout once per season. Less mess makes staying organized a lot easier.

What is YOUR favorite simply solution to everyday mess?  Share your tips with us.

Have a ThirtyOne-derful day!

A Mobile Office Season

What do you think of when we talk about “mobile offices”? Social media, cell phones and email? Or are you a paper person?  Is your truck full of catalogs, order forms, samples and anything else you might need if a customer should approach you?   Maybe you just carry a large purse so you have stuff at your finger tips?  I am guilty of this one!  I figure it saves a trip to the car and the possibility of missing an opportunity.

With the holiday shopping season in full swing, you want to be ready, right?  Ready to capture a new customer or hostess or maybe even a new team member.

An article on Direct Sales Education Foundation shared some tips on how to be mobile friendly in a cost effective way. Most of us in direct sales have been bombarded with this kind of training while some of us are a little slower to catch on (count me in this group).

For those who are old school, we have a mobile office in our car.  Always ready to share the gift of Thirty One.  I use Thirty One’s Zip Top Organizing Tote with a Fold n File.  It is perfect especially for those who carry samples.  A perfect solution with 7 outside pockets for carrying all those extras. Thirty One doesn’t have samples but mine is also filled with some of our smaller most requested products.

The Fold n File fits right inside the tote and is great for hanging files. You never want to be unprepared, right?  This is also a great set-up for teachers, social workers or anyone whose business is on the go.

Maggie from BeautiControl is a great testimony to how her mobile office saved her. She arrived at a party only to realize she forgot ALL of her paperwork.  How could she do a home spa without catalogs, orders forms, etc? Too far from home to go back or to have anyone bring them to her, she remembered she had a complete mobile office in her trunk.  What a great feeling to get a text saying I “saved” her party (and her life).

What if you don’t need a mobile office.? How about: diaper bag, overnight bag, gym bag, quick trip to the grocery store, travel bag, car organizer, snack bag, dvd holder…..what would YOU use this bag for?

Maybe you are looking for something more compact?  Something you could drop in another tote or maybe hang on the back of the seat when you are out and about? Our Hanging Traveler’s Case is a great alternative.

Another option is our Your Way Cube with a lid  Rethink your mobile office. This smart solution features structured sides, handles and an embroidery option for labeling.  It’s also a great way to conquer the clutter in the pantry, closet, kids’ rooms – and more.

Be sure to gather information from people you talk to.  The purpose of gathering information is with the intent of connecting with them SOON. When you meet someone and give them YOUR company information, get their name and their email address.  Most people will share their email.  Then be sure to FOLLOW-UP.  The fortune is in the follow-up, right?

Don’t be caught out and about without YOUR tools to conduct business this holiday season (or anytime of the year)!

Have a ThirtyOne-derful day!