Hope Wissel

Shabby Chic

This morning’s devotional on ibelieve was entitled Shabby Chic Refinishing which got me to thinking of my own transformation over the last 6 months or so.

For many of us, we define ourselves by what we do or who we are related to not by just our name.  Growing up – I was Bob & Joan’s daughter.  At college – I didn’t know who I was.  When I entered the adult work force – I was Hope – Security Supervisor or Social Worker.  For several years, I carried the title of I am Hope – a recovering addict.  Then as a mom – I was always “Belinda’s mom”.  Don’t get me wrong – I wore each of my titles or hats with pride because that is what defined me.  I was like an antique (yes I am reaching the age to be called one) that had been covered many times with paint to change its color to match the environment that it was in. When Belinda left for college, for the first year I held on to that title for security purposes.  Then I had work so there I was a COO (Chief Operating Officer) for a non-profit.  I clung to that title for about 5 years because it kept me from peeling off the layers of who Hope really was.  

When I decided that I wanted to move into leadership with my direct sales company, I began to wear a new title “bag lady”.  I was excited to be part of a group again – able to be behind the scenes but again not peeling off all of the layers that covered who I truly was.  With a lot of help, the layers have been peeled off and the rough edges are being smoothed.  See, now that I peeled off those layers, I had to let ME shine.  I am working on ME and my personal growth.  I listen to 31 minute calls that will help me to grow my business.  I listen to direct sales trainers on how to be a good leader.  I attend meetings and networking events to meet more people as well as step out of my comfort zone.  I am no longer defined by the job title I have but I am now Hope Wissel – wife, mom, daughter, business women, life/ business coach, teacher, consultant, party planner and blogger.  I wear many hats but now not just one of them defines who I am.

If you met someone on the street and they said “Hi, my name is Hope.  It is nice to meet you?”  Would your immediate response be “XX, (your child’s name) mom? Or “XX, (your hubby’s name) wife?  They are hats we where but they do not define who we are on the inside.  Peel off the layers and find out who is on the inside.  It can be a little scary but the journey is AMAZING!

Transform from the shabby chic antique covered with layers to the polished antique that shows its natural beauty.  Have a ThirtyOne-derful day!

Hope Wissel

Super______________(Fill in the Blank)

This morning while reading my morning devotional emails, one struck me with an “AHA” moment.  Now I have read it (and heard it) before but today it really hit me – Did you know that “Super Mom (or fill in the blank with anything that fits you) is a Fairy Tale!  This morning’s devotional on ibelieve was a great story that made me think about where I am today…

Since Belinda is grown and I have passed the “super mom” stage in my life, it doesn’t mean that I am not still trying to be “Super Wife” or “Super Consultant/Director”. In the past, I wasn’t trying to be anything – I was just juggling all of the balls (work, Belinda’s cheering schedule, house, family, church, etc) and most days it seemed to work. Now, I am learning how to juggle (or the new word is “balance) new things. This statement stood out for me “When you look around and see other mothers who appear to be “mothering” better than you, don’t be fooled. They are probably doing whatever it takes….”.  Yes, I still compare myself to others.  Yes, I am still trying to do it all.  This morning I am re-grouping, remembering how I use to do the “super mom” thing and applying it to the new struggles in my life  

I am trying to be “Super Consultant”, “Super Wife”, “Super Family Member” and “Super Employee (at my part-time job)”.  GUESS WHAT???? I felt like I was failing in all areas then I read this line in the article Successful mothers are not the ones who have never struggled. They are the ones who never give up, despite the struggles.”  For me, the word “balance” seemed to create new visions of how my life/ schedule should be in a perfect world.  In reality, I need to just learn (or re-learn) how to manage my time and my schedule.  

Are you trying to be “Super ________”?  The greatest gift I got this morning was the realization that I don’t have to be SUPER ANYTHING!  Sounds basic, right?  For those of us who continue to compare ourselves to friends who seem to have it all together, to advertising about those who manage everything (including being at their ideal weight) – it is not easy.  It is a daily struggle.  So, I am going back to something I learned in rehab so many years ago – “one day at a time”.  I tend to look at the BIG picture and lose sight of the small things that need to be done but to get out of the workaholic – super mode, I need to step back to what kept me sane on any given day.  Just for today, I am going to make a list of things to get done, stop feeling like I have to answer emails within seconds of receiving them, stop stalking Facebook and just do what I have to do.

When life gets crazy and I begin thinking about pulling all nighters to get things done – I will revert to the prayer that gave me strength when I was weak…
God grant me 
the serenity to accept the things I can not change,
the courage to change the things I can,
the wisdom to know the difference.
Your will not mine be done!

Have a ThirtyOne-derful day.