How To Get Get Unstuck

Are you stuck?  By definition, “stuck means being trapped in something, unable to progress”.  Is that you?

Maybe you are stuck in the same job, you don’t like?  Maybe financially, you are unable to pay down debt, just maintaining the status quo?  You know making those minimum payments and not getting anywhere.  Maybe you are trying to get off those few pounds of winter weight BEFORE the warmer weather finally arrives?  It won’t be long before summer is here, right?

You can get unstuck in just THREE simple steps.  If you are like me, you are wondering why no one ever told you this before, right?  It almost seems like the “magic wand” to getting unstuck.  Andy Andrews is AMAZING.  If you haven’t read his books, get busy because you will be motivated in a way you have never been before.

When you hear success stories about other people, do they feel unrealistic?  The truth is there is a way for you to get unstuck and start living a life you want to live…

Here is Andy Andrew’s 3 step process:

1. Identify where you want to go.

First, you need to know what your end goal is so you know where you’re going.  This one is a true struggle for me.  It seems to change as the days change with MS and recovery…. Think about it…. if you could wave a magic wand and make your life look like anything you want, what would it look like?

• Where would you live?
• What would you be most excited about?
• Who would you spend most of your time with?
• How would you feel when you wake up in the morning?
• What problems and fears would no longer weigh down your thoughts?

Don’t limit yourself with fear and doubt.  Remember NOTHING is impossible so answer them honestly. This is how you will identify your target.

2. Align your life with your key talents.

The path you choose in life needs to be aligned with your talents because they reveal what you were made to do.

If your dream is to be a professional singer but you don’t have the gift of voice or pitch, it won’t happen. Get the picture of how to pick your path based on your key talents.  Believe it or not, the right path will begin to open up and become clearer than ever when you are using your key talents.

Not sure what you are talented in?  Everyone has talents – most of us have multiple talents.  Here are two things which hold you back from identifying those talents:

1. It’s much harder to evaluate our own talents than the talents of others.

Overconfident people tend to inflate their talents which don’t match up with reality, while people who lack confidence tend to massively overlook or undersell their talents.  Yup, this is where I am most days.  Recovery is teaching me I have assets and gifts which I need to embrace.  Discovering your talent will begin to increase your level of belief in yourself.

2. We tend to have a narrow definition of talent.

Maybe you don’t think you have “cool talents” like running fast or singing great. What I have found, is one of my talents is making people smile when they are struggling which can help to make a huge differences in their lives. My biggest fear is “how will I earn an income from it?”, but the truth is when I stopped worrying about it and started making a difference, things slowly started to happen.  I am working on re-building on it and making it the foundation of my side hustles.  Being honest and open about where I am and who I am goes a long way with customers.

3. Discover the skills you can develop to complement your talent.Think of your talent as your main asset.  Then add your skills to the mix and they will help to make your talent stronger.  Skills can be learned and you can incorporate just about any skill into your life.  It is important to identify the right skills to complement your talent.

If you’re a great singer, you’ll probably want to hone your stage presence.  As for me, I am finding my writing is an important skill – this blog.  So I am working on my writing skills.  I am also working on ways to make a difference each day in someone’s life.

So ask yourself…

• What skill would allow me to impact more lives with my talent?
• Is someone with a similar talent using it to do great work? What skills do they seem to possess?
• Who do I have to become to live a life in perfect alignment with my gifts?

Keep asking yourself these questions.  As you build your foundation, the answers will change.  Believe it or not, you will become more valuable than you could ever imagine.

A word of caution: It’s important to keep in mind no pathway in life is straight—no matter where you’re going or where you want to go, you have to be flexible.

Consider the bumps along the way as an essential part of the process instead of setbacks.  Don’t let “Negative Nellie” zap your energy and steal your dream.

What ways are you developing your skills and using your talents? Tell me in the comments!

Have a ThirtyOne-derful day!

Actually, I Can Movement

I don’t know about you but I am my own worst critic.  I tend to believe things which simply aren’t true. You know those horrible inner gremlins which want to keep you from feeling the JOY of every day.  What if you WERE good enough, just the way you are? What if failure wasn’t an option? What if you believed, “Actually, I Can”?

STOP right now and take a minute to think about all the things you’re capable of .  I BELIEVE you can do anything you put your mind to!  NOW share the positivity with the women around you.

Thirty-One is launching an ALL IN campaign this fall to inspire others to believe in themselves. When we take time to better ourselves from within, we inspire others to believe – “Actually, I Can.”

 

Write a love letter to yourself

 

Play this fill-in-the-blank  game to get yourself in a positive headspace! Without reading the story, fill in the blanks with a word of your choosing. When you’ve filled them all in, read it back to yourself and feel the love.  I would love to have you share YOURS with us…

 

Wear your confidence close to your heart

 

Design an “Actually, I Can” charm to wear (or gift!) as a reminder to keep moving forward, no matter what life tosses your way. Our Personalization Studio makes it easy to create a custom piece of jewelry that makes a statement, like a personalized Just Write™ Rectangle Charm on a long Dainty Rolo Chain.  I have two of them I were every day – “Just for Today” as a reminder of my recover after relapse and “Courage” because it is my word for this year.  The both remind me of how far I have come over the last 16 months…

 

Pin up these mantra cards

 

Are you a fan of mantras?  Did you know when you repeat a positive mantra every day for 21 days, if will actually become something you believe in?  Positive energy draws more positive energy so why not give these mantras a try.  Use these fun, printable mantra cards to spread the love and keep the positivity going! Hang them on your mirror or leave them for others to find as a reminder of all the amazing things you and others are capable of.

Help survivors of domestic violence

I have shared my story before of being a child of domestic violence – something not talked about back then but it was.  Whether it is physical, emotional or verbal – more than 1 in 3 women will experience some form of domestic violence in her lifetime. This fall, Thirty One is  standing with survivors by supporting an issue which affects so many.

Throughout the entire fall season, Thirty-One Gives wants to empower women to believe in themselves, find safety and rebuild their lives. During October and November, you can Round Up! your Thirty-One purchase to the next nearest dollar (after tax and shipping) or make a donation of any amount to support survivors of domestic violence through our partners: National Network to End Domestic Violence in the United States.

Funds raised by the Round Up! campaign will go to specific programs run by these organizations to help survivors of domestic violence get back on their feet.

In the United States, funds will support the Independence Project through National Network to End Domestic Violence, a credit-building microloan program that helps survivors of domestic violence rebuild after experiencing financial abuse. Women can receive a zero-fee, zero- interest loan of $100 to boost their credit scores. By paying back just $10 for 10 months, she can get approved to sign a lease, buy a car and get started on her new, safe life!

Share your giving heart this season by participating in Round Up! this season – your donations will make an enormous difference in the lives of survivors of domestic violence.

Have a blessed day!

What is Your Life Purpose?

 

Have you ever wondered why you are here?  I don’t mean just in this house? Or in this job? Or with this person/ spouse/ partner?

In the movie The Color Purple, there is a scene in which Miss Celie finally musters the courage to leave Mister. He’d just finished saying some pretty nasty things to her (paraphrasing): “You’re poor. You’re black. You’re ugly. Nobody wants you.”

To which Miss Celie replied, “I’m poor. I’m black. I might even be ugly. But I’m here!”

There is a reason each of us is here.  Honestly, most days I wonder what my purpose is….I’m sure many have lost family and friends who were here last year and who aren’t now.  Many have passed on fulfilling their purpose on this earth.  But you are still here. And your most important job in life is to know why.  I know pretty heavy for early morning, right?

I have been pondering this question for the last few weeks.  What is my purpose in life?  There are days (very few) when I think I know but more times then not, I’m clueless. I could blame it on the MS or the lack of memory or 100 different things but the truth is some days I feel lost.  Torn between what I think I “should be” doing and what I really want to do.  Torn between having the confidence to work my angel business releasing my creativity or just sticking with what I know works in my direct sales business.  Some may say do both BUT my MS requires me to keep things simple.  What about you, do you know your purpose?

Can you state your purpose in a single, simple sentence?  I know I can’t!  If you are like me, ask yourself this question:

How is someone’s life better when they cross your path?

Whatever your answer, is, can you say it quickly – in under 15 seconds.  Why so fast?  Because in most cases we only have a few seconds to share with people we meet.

I believe my purpose is “bringing hope and a smile to those who are struggling, reminding them they are special”. I like to help people.  Maybe it is the people pleaser in me.  Maybe it is just the “helper gene” LOL.  Or maybe it is just the fact someone was nice to me when I was struggling.

For some, it may sound kind of cheesy.  The simple gesture of bringing a smile to the face of others makes a difference in their life (and in mine).  It can make a dark day sunny.  It can dry a tear in their eye.  It can change their negative mindset to positive.  YES!  A simple smile can do it.

Your purpose is about how you uniquely serve the world and make it better in some way. It uses your unique gifts, strengths and experiences. It is something you do well. And it comes naturally to you.  It means you are willing to share your gifts and talents with others.  I am seeing new gifts develop or at least come out again – my creativity in making angels.  Seeing how putting the pieces together to form something wish brings memories to life is so humbling.

I think about my success as a Social Work….I know I made a difference. Some may think I am being conceited but I actually saw the difference I was making.   I am actually humbled by the blessing I am able to give to others.  Even when things are tight for me, there is a way to give back – a cup of coffee, a ride to a meeting, a smile, a thank you – everything makes a difference.

Today, I challenge you to take a few minutes and answer the question….Once you get the answer, write it down. Don’t forget it. Make it your mantra. A fulfilling life is a life lived with purpose.

How is someone’s life better because they cross your path?  Share your life’s purpose with us.

Have a ThirtyOne-derful day!

What Lesson is Your Life Offering Now?

I want you to take a minute and think about what lessons your life is offering you right now.  The truth is when we change the way we look at situations, good and bad, we can actually learn from them.

God offers lessons everyday and it is up to us to learn from them.  If you are anything like me, you are hard headed (a typical Taurus trait) and may need to go through things multiple times before you actually learn the lesson. As a result, the same lessons are offered over and over again. Whether you are going through a frustrating or exciting time, there is something to learn which will prepare you for greater opportunities on your horizon.

Today, I want you to be intentional about looking for those lessons and finding ways to apply them to the daily challenges you face.  Here are five lessons you may have learned on your journey. If so, consider these a reminder today:

1. Nothing is permanent.

Believe it or not, change is good.  The first change I remember was moving from my childhood home to a new neighborhood at the age of 11.  It took me awhile but I adjusted.  Over the years of going to college, and changing jobs, I quickly learned to adapt to new circumstances, new people, and new surroundings. Nothing in life is permanent.  This fact should encourage you to revel in the joy your life is bringing right now.  It will help lessen your frustration when you encounter circumstances you don’t like. For some change is not easy, for others they have learned to roll with the punches.  Whether it is the loss of a loved one, a new job, or a chronic illness, there is a lesson to be learned.  If there is something or someone you love, in what ways could you embrace and enjoy them more? If it is something you don’t think you can handle, just hold on a little longer. This too shall pass.

2. You are either living on purpose or living by accident.

Too many people wander through life haphazardly, for the last few years I have been one of them.  I latched onto acquaintances, jobs, and life situations just because they crossed my path. I lived by accident.  It wasn’t my plan nor did I actually think I was.  I struggled to find my purpose.  A course called “Fit Within” is helping me to create a fulfilling life where I am purposeful in my decisions. Don’t make a decision without reflecting on what long-term impact it will have on you and the people you love. Pursue the things which empower you to express your values and talents. Choose to be around people you feel good being around—inspiring, supportive people who are moving in the same direction you are. Know your purpose and live in it every day in your work, relationships, health, finances, and spiritual life. Strive not to end up anywhere by accident—just because it was convenient.

3. Fear does not necessarily mean stop.

Does FEAR cripple you?  Do you want to run away or are you ready to roar like a lion and face it head on?  Fear is as powerful as you allow it to be. Most of us feel fear and take it as a warning to stop moving forward. Been there, done that and have more t-shirts then I can count!  We should see fear as a natural emotion which pops up every time we venture outside of our comfort zone. When you feel fear, keep moving. Step out of your comfort zone.  It will help you to grow AND get you closer to your goals. What are you afraid of right now which is keeping you from living your best life? Will you make a decision to move forward despite your fear?

4. Less is more.

Are you someone who shows their worth through money and material possessions?  Are you all about keeping up with the Jones’?  Do you play the comparison game?  The simple truth about self-empowerment is it comes from knowing nothing material will ever prove your worth. This is a lesson I need to be reminded of periodically.  Your worth comes from your identity as a child of God and the impact you make in the lives of others. Don’t worry about impressing everyone else. If you are a people pleaser, this might be a tough pill to swallow.  Focus on impressing God (or your Higher Power) by living the purpose for which He created you—serving and blessing others in the way only you can.

5. The power to change your life is in the choices you make.

SMACK!  This is perhaps the most powerful and toughest of lessons. Better choices create better circumstances. It’s not what happens to you which most impacts your life; it is how you respond to it. Your choices create your future. What kind of future are you creating with the choices you are making today? You can choose to enjoy your life or to be miserable. You can choose to be flexible or keep hitting a brick wall at work or in a relationship. You can choose to pursue your dreams or keep making excuses for why you can’t achieve them. The choice is yours.

What is the most important lesson your life is offering you right now? How will you apply this lesson in your future?

Today I challenge you to take an action in the next 48 hours which will enrich your life in a positive, meaningful way.  Share it with us.

Have a ThirtyOne-derful day!

 

What Animal Would You Be?

Happy Monday….. suitcase is now in the bedroom and the hunt for what to pack has started.  We leave EARLY Thursday morning for Columbus for Thirty One’s National Conference and I can’t wait to be back in my pink bubble.  I will try NOT to flood my Facebook and blog posts with everything PINK – who am I kidding, of course I will.  Yes, I squirreled…

I started a class at church last week on finding my passion and my spiritual gifts.  Lots of new people and Pastor asks this same question every time as an ice breaker.  I usually cringe because I can never think of an animal to describe me.  I was grateful he started on the opposite side of the table which gave me time to think (and ask for God’s help) about which one I would pick.

First choice was a teddy bear – okay, maybe not technically an animal but it really would fit me.  Teddy bears are soft, cuddly and provide comfort for those who are struggling. This is what I love to do – give hugs and provide support for those around me.  But as I sat there and thought about it, God placed another animal on my mind….

A butterfly.  This one took a little bit more thought, I mean how was I like a butterfly.  I asked for the words and here is what I heard:

You help to transform women who are struggling by inspiring them to fly.  Spreading their wings to find themselves and reach for their goals.

WOW!  It is true!  It is my passion and desire!  Whether it is starting their own business, coaching them in their current business, helping them battle nasty inner gremlins or help them to see themselves as others see them – transforming lives is how I want to make a difference.  When I shared it, those who knew me in the room all shook their head “yes”.

What about you? What animal would you be?

When I came home, I started thinking about the transformations in my life.  I need to remember I deserve to be happy, truly happy with a joy from within.  I need to believe in myself just as others believe in me.  I need to see myself through their eyes.  I need to embrace the transformation –  Feel it. Believe it.  And know I deserve it.

What about you?  Are you living your life as the “animal” you would be?  If you aren’t happy as the animal you are now, how would you change it?

I want you to remember success is always within your reach.  There will be struggles but it simply means there are lessons to be learned.  Your  journey is yours alone but others can learn from it.  Comparison is not in the plan.

I am on my way of emerging from the cocoon and becoming the beautiful butterfly ready to fly inspiring others.  Give it a chance, what have you got to loose.  You deserve to have all of the blessings waiting for you.  I can’t wait to celebrate your successes.

Share you animal with us and why..

Have a ThirtyOne-derful day!