Hope Wissel, Relax, Reflect, Recharge

Waiting in hope


Rest, Relax, Reflect… yes, it is Sunday and I am off to the last of 4 days in a row at work.  I mean I used to work 60 hours and commute so what is the big deal, right?

The blessing is that I get to be at “home base” today.  We are down one person as relief in one of the properties, so that means that we all pitch in and help.  For some that means working LOTS of extra hours.  For others it means adding a few days to their schedule.  While for others it means adding a few days PLUS moving between three locations.  Yes, the last one is me and I have to admit that I am not a happy camper.  So, in an effort to get past the frustration, the anger and annoyance of work, I am truly putting my hope in God.

Hope that he will continue to bless my business as he has the last two weeks.  Hope that he will guide my therapy sessions so that I can get past being “stuck”.  Hope that I will again love myself – finding the confidence and self-esteem that I lost so long ago.  I can’t remember where I saw this but it hit home:

Help is available to us too. But we have to learn to help ourselves to it. We don’t have to feel guilty about appearing weak and admitting our needs. But we do have to learn to ask. Directly, by using words. No one can read our minds. No one is going to waltz in, recognize our predicament, and save us. Not even our husbands or our best friends or our own mothers.

Although I seldom ask for help whether it be in the house, at work or in my business – it is not because I thought that I was indispensable.  It was more out of fear that someone would not like me or worse yet, love me.  How crazy is that, right?  I always believed that if people really wanted to help, they would just pitch in and help.  All these years, many would say that I was being a martyr when the truth it is really part of my adjustment disorder.  I know, you are thinking “Now, that will be her new excuse for everything”.  No need to worry – not an excuse just a reality to the fact that I am not crazy and that my addictions have impacted my life in more ways that I really thought.

With the help of my wonderful hubby – I have asked for help.  Jody is my new therapist/life coach.  Although I am not sure after two sessions that I like her rough edges, I do believe that is the right person for me.  She has helped me identify areas that I need help with and that I am willing to accept help in.  This is a huge step because my favorite word is “FINE” and the truth is that I am not fine.  I am trying in God that he will guide my steps through this journey.

Remember, If we want help, if we need help, if we truly want someone to share the load… we need to ask.

What do you need help with?  Have you reached out and asked for it or are you just expecting everyone to know what to do?  Share your stories with us.

Have a ThirtyOne-derful day!