Unclutter Your Life

Grow Your Confidence – Part 2

Last week, I talked about growing your self confidence and I received a lot of feedback.  I won’t say i am surprised because despite all of the overwhelmingly positive posts on Facebook and Instagram, there are people who struggle. They struggle with standing tall and proud letting their sparkle shine through.

So here are a few more things which might help you boost your confidence…

1. Take some time for personal care.   I will admit, I am the worst at this.  When I am feeling yuk, all I want to do is lay around in my sweats.  The truth is, we should really nudge ourselves to do something for us.  Now, I don’t mean spend a fortune. How about pulling out your favorite shaving cream and shaving those legs? The warmer weather is coming.  How about deep conditioning your hair? Or even soaking in a bubble bath?  Pamper yourself with something you enjoy doing for you. Give yourself permission to enjoy life. Giving yourself permission to relax and even PLAY, will pay you back ten fold.  You will gradually change your mindset so the fun times come more naturally.

2. Visualize and Reframe.  This is going to sound a little crazy since I always talk about how important positive thinking is BUT believe me it works.  Take a few minutes to reflect on the problems you are facing in your life. Feel the feelings associated with the problem.  Do you naturally assume the worst – let’s REFRAME the problem and the solution!  Nothing is hopeless but when you believe it is, all you will feel is unhappiness and that you are a failure.

So, I want you to pick one problem and look at it in a new light by recreating a positive outcome.  I know it can be tough but you can do it.  Imagine a positive solution and really feel the feeling of the new positive ending to your story. Now, make the new ending happen!

3. Make a List of Your Positive Attributes.  Yes you do have them.  We all do even if we don’t always see them.  For many years, I heard “you are your own worst enemy” and I know I am not alone.  It is time to make a list of your positive gifts (physical and mental). We need to find an inner love for ourselves, instead of looking to others for approval.  I struggled with this exercise for years and then with the help of a friend, I reached out to several close friends and asked for their help.  I asked them to describe me in just 3 words.  I was blown away by the response. Once I wrote them all together, I put them into positive mantras I could repeat until I really started to believe them…

4. Fake it till you make it.   I know this sounds easy and hard to believe it actually works, but trust me it is easy and it does work. Remember those negative thoughts like:”This day sucks”, “I feel ugly” or “I am not good enough” guess what? Those thoughts radiate and everyone knows how you are feeling.  You need to keep your thoughts in check, so when the negative self talk creeps back up- proclaim the opposite. This will help you to build your self worth cause the negative inner gremlins can get pretty sneaky.

5. Get enough sleep.   I know as busy women, who has time for a good’s night sleep, right?  What is the definition of a good night’s sleep?  Is it 5 hours or maybe less?  Maybe it means a night when the kids aren’t climbing in your bed.  When you are tired and your body is run down, it’s difficult to feel good about yourself. Your body is dragging, and the negative inner gremlins are ready to rear their ugly heads. As much as you may hate to hear it, your body needs a solid 6-8 hours of sleep – peaceful uninterrupted sleep. I used to live on about 5 hours then age creeped in and health struggles.  I am grateful my hubby got me into a routine of at least 7 hours of sleep.  There are days when I get less but I can tell because my sparkle dulls just a little.  I know it is not always easy but find a happy medium for you so you have the energy to fight off those nasty gremlins.

I would love to hear from you and know what you do to boost your confidence on those tough days.  

Have a ThirtyOne-derful day!

 

Unclutter Your Life

Changing Your Intent Will Change Your Situation

Happy Monday! You have the CHOICE to make today whether to have a good day or a bad day?  Which will it be? Struggling with the Monday morning blues?  Let’s shift your mindset so you can change the way the day or week will go….

One of my goals every day is to show up in my life – in my relationships, my work, my finances, and with my health.  Am I always successful? NO!  Do I keep trying? YES!  Why?  Because when I continue to show up reflecting who I want to be, I begin to see changes in my life making it easier to reach my goals.

What is challenging for you right now?  Is it work?  Your marriage/ relationships? Finances?  What if you could change the intent to see if it changes the situation.  Pick one area of your life you would like to see a change.

For example, if work is challenging for you right now, you could set an intention for how you want to show up at work:

“My intention is to maintain my calm and peace in the midst of the storm going on at work.”

“My intention is to keep making calls to customers despite the answering machines or negative attitude some may have”

A simple change in your mindset will help you change your response when things get frustrating during the day.  Not sure you will remember your intention?  I know it is hard when you are in the moment of chaos.  How about setting a reminder on your phone (hourly, multiple times, whatever) to remind you of your intention?  Know you are going to be in a stressful situation, set the reminder for about 15 minutes BEFORE the meeting or event to take you mind from the negative to the positive.  I do this on days when I am struggling with depression, it helps to clear my head of Negative Nellie and Doubtful Debbie.  

Changing your intention will also change the way others respond to you.  Changing your intention will change how situations unfold.  The best part is changing your intention  is it will allow opportunities to find you. You will be feeding the Universe with your positive energy.  Positive attracts positive, right?

What is your intention for this week?  What would happen if the best version of you showed up all week, you know the one you are proud of?

Imagine for a moment what it would look like to show up as your most powerful, authentic self in whatever situation you are struggling with…. what would change?

Share your thoughts with us..

Have a ThirtyOne-derful day!

Unclutter Your Life

Throwback Thursday – I’d Be Happy If…

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UGH!  I cringe every time I see this picture but it is a constant reminder for me. Yes, it is me at a hefty 295 pounds with my awesome daughter.  This is definitely a #throwback.

This was a period of time in my life when Negative Nellie and Doubtful Debbie were playing along side me.  My mantra then was always “I will be happy when…..” and as a result I sometimes missed out on things.

Have you every said or even thought these words? Have you started a sentence with “when I am…., I will be happy”? I will be honest and say there are still some days when those thoughts knock on my door.

On my weight loss journey to goal weight, my favorite line was “I’ll be happy when I reach goal weight”.   Guess what?  I reached goal weight and there was no magic wand to make me happy.  When fear and doubt creep into my business, I say “I’ll be happy to make my minimum goal”. OH NO!!!mrbill1

The Universe brings us what we put out there.  Fear and doubt brings more fear and doubt.  The statement “I’d be happy if ….” takes our focus off the blessings we already have and those waiting for us.  We miss out on the moment and no matter what you may think – good, bad or otherwise – the moment is a blessing.

What if you were to change this statement to “I’m thankful for…..”?  Sometimes in the dark it is hard to see the blessings.  Maybe you are struggling with finances, a shaky marriage, addiction, homelessness or (fill in the blank).  There is blessings in them.  Maybe it is a stranger who smiles at you or pays you a compliment.  Maybe it is a friend who drops by unannounced with groceries.  Maybe it is a song on the radio which evokes a pleasant memory.  Being thankful for the smallest thing truly will make a difference in your life.

So, today let’s list what we are thankful for this week. This is my list from 2014 (since this is #TBT) I am thankful this week for:

  • A relationship with God that gives me comfort when I struggle
  • A loving husband who supports me no matter what
  • A loving family who accepts me for who I am along with all of my faults
  • Feeling a little bit better and learning how to manage my IBS
  • Not re-injurying my back during the mini storm last Monday
  • A business that allows me the flexibility to make my own schedule
  • A supportive network (ETTM) of fellow solo-preneurs and network marketers
  • A full March calendar that allows me to share Thirty One with friends and family
  • Only nudging the scale up (1 lb) a little this week. Yes, I would love a loss but as I change my eating habits there will be some changes in my weight. Building a bridge and getting over it!
  • Receiving an unexpected refund check when the checkbook was getting a little low

As I look back and reflect on this past week, here is what I am thankful for now:

  • A relationship with God which comforts me when I struggle (never changes)
  • A loving husband who supports me no matter what (my rock)
  • A loving family who accepts me for who I am along with all of my faults
  • Learning to manage my MS
  • A business which allows me the flexibility to make my own schedule
  • Grateful the scale keeps going down every week
  • A support network who continue to help me stay accountable to my goals.

Don’t think you are blessed?  Think this is all silly?  The truth is a change in your mindset will definitely change your outlook and the results.  Start with the little things you are grateful for: waking up in the morning, no traffic on the way to work, a roof over your head, family, food on the table, a job, and the list goes on.

I could go on and on because I am BLESSED.  When doubt and fear creep in or Negative Nellie or Doubtful Debbie try to pay a visit – I take a gratitude walk. I STOP and start listing all of the things I am grateful at the MOMENT – no matter how large or small. For me, this closes the door on the negative thoughts and helps me to focus on the positive things in my life.

What is your “I’d be happy if” statement? Let’s change it from a negative to a positive…

Here is one of my favorite songs by Laura Story…

Have a ThirtyOne-derful day!

Business Tips and Tricks, Home Office

The Work Week Commandments

monday morning

YEAH!  It is Monday and I am thrilled.  I worked some crazy hours the past 11 days to cover for a co-worker who was on vacation.  Thankfully, it was not every day but truth be told, I couldn’t have handled anymore.

I am ready to kick October into gear – I know we are halfway through the month but I am not giving up because it started off slow.  I had an awesome event on Saturday and I have some exciting things coming up the rest of the month in my business. When I get crazy busy and find myself spending less time than I want in my business, feelings of being unfulfilled, overwhelmed, never good enough, overstretched, and underutilized start floating around.  I received and email about setting rules for yourself to keep your workweek fulfilling, productive, purposeful, and joyful along the way and wanted to share it with you.

Are you interested in hearing more?  These tips came from Jen Carrington and are part of her The Intuitive Workweek program. You can refer back to whenever you start to doubt your natural instincts, or fear you’re not good enough, or when you’re feeling stuck and overwhelmed in the daily routine.

These are Jen’s workweek commandments, rooted in her own vision and desires for her workday. Hopefully, they encourage you to know you have permission to work in a different way.

1. No matter what gets done today, I am enough

My self-worth is not defined by how productive I am each day. It doesn’t serve me to live in a culture where being enough is hinged on an external source of validation. No matter what gets done and is left undone, I am committed to living in a culture of enough in my work and my life.  So true for me too!

2. Be in this for the long haul, not for the instant gratification

If I pursue instant gratification alone, I will never build strong foundations in my business and my life. I’m in this journey for the long haul and I will sow seeds now I can reap along the way, instead of obsessing over instant wins on a daily basis.  Me too!

3. Leave people better than I found them

Whether it’s through the work I do with my clients, a simple email exchange, or through the content I share online, my core goal is to show up and always play a positive and encouraging part in someone else’s day. In every interaction I have in my business, I want it to be the guiding focus.  Me too!

4. I have to live it to give it

I cannot truly be of service if I’m running on an empty tank. I cannot encourage and support others to live a wholehearted, fulfilling, and impactful creative life if I’m not also doing it myself. My number one job is to live what I’m here to give, so I can truly show up and be of service along the way.  WOW!

5. Show up wholeheartedly each and every workday

When I’m showing up in my business, I want to do it with a whole heart. I want to show up 100% and give the best I can give that day. There’s no room for a half-heart in this journey. Showing up wholeheartedly isn’t the same as hustling myself into the ground for the sake of it; it’s honoring the energy I am able to give to my work and showing up fully when I’m working in my business.

Although, many may apply to you, it is important each of us look for our own work week commandments.  Here are some questions to ask yourself to find yours:

  • What boundaries, mindsets, and mantras do I want to guide me each workday?
  • What core values do I want to honor when I show up in my business?
  • What do I want to remind myself of each workday so I can run my business in a way that feels good to me?

Does your daily grind feel far from dreamy and productive?  I have been there, done that and got the t-shirt.  Today, I am focusing on discovering a better and more joyful way to work in my business. You can choose to be more. You can make brave and bold steps forward towards a life which works for you.

Have a ThirtyOne-derful day!

 

 

Unclutter Your Life

What Do You WANT?

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It is Monday morning……

  • Are you dragging yourself out of bed to start your week? OR are you looking forward to the week ahead.
  • What do you WANT out of today?
  • When you put your head on your pillow tonight…what would you like to have FINISHED?
  • What PROGRESS could you make on your goals today?

I am blessed with no “brain fog” this morning.  I may still move a little slower getting out of but I am ready to start the week.  What about you?

I had the pleasure of meeting Traci Bild at Mom Grows a Business Conference a few years ago.   Traci was also a guest speaker at Thirty One’s National Conference that same year.  Traci’s message seemed to go in one ear and out the other.

A few days ago, her video popped up (a God wink, I am sure). Obviously, God has a message that I needed to hear which is why she keeps showing up in my life.  I am thinking that there is someone else out there that could stand to hear the message too.  Click the link and take just 45 minutes to listen to the video! unnamedI have been soaking up like a sponge her daily words of inspiration – check her out on Facebook.  The first thing that hit me with a SMACK was the importance of not just setting business goals but also setting personal goals. It makes sense, right?  We have set business goals all of our life but when was the last time you wrote down a goal for your personal life?  Think about the things that matter most to you then write a goal with 3 action steps.

I have said it a zillion times BUT it needs to be repeated…

The KEY to being happy and successful – personally and professionally – is changing your current mindset and belief system.  It is this thinking that keeps you stuck or repeating the same habits in your life and your business.

Just for today, let’s make a change.  So,

If you REACT all day long, there is no progress.
If you DREAD your day, there is no progress.
If you RESENT your bills, your schedule, your kids, your job, there is no progress.
If you SURF, read, piddle and social all day, there is no progress.
If you WAIT for a better time, there is no progress.
If you WISH for someone else to be more supportive, there is no progress.
If you WANDER through your list, your desk, your mail, your email and your tasks…there is no progress.

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Today, make PROGRESS on PURPOSE.  Even if you just set a timer for an HOUR (okay, make it 15 minutes to start) so that YOU can move FORWARD.

What will you do to move forward today?  Share with us so we can CELEBRATE you.

Have a ThirtyOne-derful day!