Thank you Sharon Jaynes for today’s message….
A monster was sneaking into my yard in the dark of night and devouring my prize plants. I never saw his beady eyes or heard his pounding footsteps—just the aftermath of his destruction. He left a trail of slime as he moved from plant to plant, leaving large gaping holes in broadleaf Gerbera daisies, gnawing entire velvety trumpet-shaped blossoms on purple petunias and reducing bushy begonias to naked stalks.
I asked a neighbor about my flowerbed’s demise and she determined, “You’ve got slugs.”
Slugs!” I exclaimed. “The yard monster is a tiny little slug?”
“You can put out slug bait to catch them and see for yourself,” my confident neighbor continued.
I sprinkled slug bait all around the yard and then waited. The next morning I viewed the “monsters” remains. The beasts were about ¼ inch long—about the size of my little toe nail.
How could something so small cause so much damage in such a short amount of time? I mused. Then my mind thought of something else that is very small that can cause enormous damage in a short amount of time…gossip. King Solomon wrote, “The words of a gossip are like choice morsels; they go down to a man’s inmost parts.” Just as one tiny slug can destroy an entire flowerbed, so can one tiny morsel of gossip destroy a person’s reputation, mar one’s character, and devour a friendship.
In the South we have this knack for making gossips sound…almost nice. All you have to do is add “bless her heart” to the end of the sentence. It goes like this: “Susie gained fifty pounds with that last pregnancy, bless her heart.” “Marcy’s husband ran off with his secretary, bless her heart.” “I heard Clair yelling at the postman yesterday, bless her heart.” But all the “bless her hearts” don’t mask what it really is…gossip.
Solomon wrote, “Whoever repeats the matter separates close friends,” (Proverbs 17:9 NIV). Charles Allen, the author of God’ Psychiatry observed: “Those of great minds discuss ideas, people of mediocre minds discuss events, and those of small minds discuss other people.” Maybe if we are spending our time talking about people, we need to fill our minds with better material such as good books and other reading material (and I don’t mean People Magazine or the National Enquirer).
What exactly is gossip? Webster defines gossip as ”easy, fluent, trivial talk, talk about people behind their backs.” It is repeating information about another person’s private affairs. If you have to look around to make sure that no one can hear what you are saying, you are probably gossiping. If you would not say something in front of the person you are talking about, then you’re probably gossiping.
We have often heard the phrase, “knowledge is power.” Perhaps that is why gossip is so appealing. It suggests a certain amount of power because, “I have the inside scoop.” But gossip is not power. On the contrary it shows a lack of power…lack of self-control.
Today, let’s make our lives a NO GOSSIP ZONE.
Have a ThirtyOne-derful day!
Woohoo Wednesday! Do you know what day it is?
Today we are going to CELEBRATE YOU and all of your awesomeness…..
If you are like me, you have an “inner gremlin” (IG) that likes to highlight your negatives instead of the positive qualities that you possess. A gremlin that we have probably stuffed down in the depths of our soul for years. Then one day, it rears his ugly head and with it comes Negative Nellie. For some it is easy to kick the IG and Nellie to the curb. Then there are those of us who let them take up space in our head.
These negative thoughts have you doubting your awesomeness. Maybe you thought it was the lack of money, or support from loved ones or the lack of a plan that was killing your dreams. But guess what – that is sooooo WRONG!
It is this inner gremlin that kills your dreams and your desires. He tells you that you’re not worthy of or able to attain your desires, It is this gremlin that has stopped countless books from being written, stopped love from being expressed, stopped careers from being changed or stopped healthy actions being taken, stopped businesses from being started, stopped amazing trips from being taken…do you see where this is going?
When you let go of this (and other) gremlins, it is one of the most powerful things you can do. Everyone has inner gremlins, it is just that some decided not to engage them so they are not able to impact their life.
So, how do we put these inner gremlins in check? We celebrate them. We acknowledge them. We stop them from gaining control of our lives. I stomped on my IG and continue to stomp on them when they rear their nasty heads by using these 2 tricks:
1. Celebrate yourself. Celebrate the things that you like about yourself. You are arming yourself with the shield that will help to protect you from those inner gremlins. Can’t think of anything? Think about the things that people compliment you on – nice hair, eyes, or smile; or a good cook, or a good friend? Write down 3 celebrations of how awesome you are. I know you can do it because YOU ROCK!
2. Own your unique strengths and gifts. We all have incredible strengths and gifts! I imagine when someone asks you what your weaknesses are, you quickly rattle them off. Do you do the same when they ask what your strengths are? I am guessing that you struggle. Maybe you are afraid it will be viewed as bragging? Maybe you honestly don’t think you have any. We all have them and we need to OWN them. Jot down your 5 biggest and most enjoyable strengths and gifts. By owning your strengths and gifts, you will be able to PROVE to your gremlin just how amazing and worthy you are.
I would love to CELEBRATE you and all of your awesomeness. Shoot me an email at
Have a ThirtyOne-derful day!
Gracious words are like a honeycomb, sweetness to the soul and health to the body – Proverbs 16:24 ESV
I was wandering around the tourist area of the Leaning Tower of Pisa. Shelves with tacky little statues, snow globes with leaning towers, and $10 T-shirts crowed small booths for tourists.
Shifty men with cases of “genuine fake” watches swarmed like bees. Rolex, Cartier, and Infinity—all for fifty bucks or less. Flashing fake gold and flaunting fake brands; their swift feet were ready to run if the authorities were to show up.
“No thank you, no thank you, no thank you,” I sang as I swam through the men hocking their wares.
Then I spotted her. She sat on a bench with colorful scarves for purchase draped over her arm. A blue, yellow and red headdress wound around her head, and a purple full-length dress hung loosely from her shoulders. The bright colors shone against the backdrop of polished mahogany skin.
What appeared to be her “handler” shared the bench with her. I walked over and bent low to look her in the eyes. “You are so beautiful,” I said.
“Deese?” she questioned as she held up the scarves for examination.
“No, not the scarves,” I replied. “YOU are beautiful!” I waved my hand from the top of her head to the hem of her dress and back up again. “YOU, all of you!”
She turned to the indifferent man beside her for translation. When she understood, her face lit up like morning and her ivory teeth flashed like a slice of sun. She simply nodded as if to say, “Thank you.”
I walked back over to the group I was traveling with, and in a few moments I felt a tap on my shoulder. It was the woman. Without words, she handed me a bracelet, one I’m thinking she had made herself.
It wasn’t anything fancy—just little white lettered cubes with alternating black beads strung together with elastic. But I wonder what it cost her to give it to a tourist.
I didn’t offer to pay for the gift. That would have taken away her pleasure in giving it. I did hand her a few coins for allowing me to take her picture.
I showed her the image of herself in my camera. “Beautiful,” I said once again. She smiled with a nod. Walked back to the bench. And handed the coins to the man.
Tears filled my eyes.
I don’t know what this woman’s life is like. I pray my assumptions are wrong. But I do know this: For one brief moment in her monotonous day of pedaling scarves, she felt lovely…because someone stopped and noticed her.
Oh how easy it is—this speaking a word of encouragement—this speaking words of life.
As you go about your day, look for opportunities to say a kind word. I promise, you won’t have to look very far.
WOOHOO, it is Monday! Hopefully you took advantage of the extra hour of sleep when you set the clocks back. I always struggle with time change whether it is forward or back. My body just wants things to be consistent, that is my comfort zone.
Today, we are going to take about POWER! I have been working with the AMAZING Eryka Peskin for a few months now and wanted to share some tips from her on “tapping into your power”. We have the power to make choices every day. We can choose how we act, react, don’t act, think, respond, and so on. We have choices.
Everyone has the power to make changes in their life and the world around them. Here are some ways to tap into your personal power to make the changes that you desire:
1. Set a goal and MAKE IT HAPPEN.
One of the most effective ways to build your sense of power is to set a goal…and then achieve it! You may already have a goal such as losing weight or exercising 3 times a week or find a new job or to make more money in your business. They are BIG goals. Set a small and doable goal. Something tiny so that you can accomplish it and feel the POWER that it brings to you.
2. Acknowledge yourself for achieving your goal.
This is one place where size doesn’t matter. Make a list of ALL of the awesome stuff you’ve done in the last week (month, year or your life). Actually write it down and post it somewhere so that you can reflect on it when struggles come. Now, CELEBRATE yourself and your accomplishments. Focus on your greatness rather than draining your energy by thinking about all you lack or could have done better. Feel the power?
3. Know the things that DISempower you, so you can choose how you react to them.
I have to admit that this simple step has brought the most POWER into my life. I know the inner gremlins of limiting beliefs, the fears and my inner critic. Each one has a name since we are on such a personal relationship. What is your “thing” or “things” that take away your power? I love that when those things get triggered, I get to decide how I am going to response because that’s where your power of choice is: the power of choice.
As for me, I make the decision daily to not let my fears or limiting beliefs determine why actions for the day. Let me tell you when the day is done, I feel AMAZING!
4. Speak up for what you want..to yourself and to the world.
Speaking your truth is such a beautiful and powerful act. This can be tough especially if you haven’t squashed those inner gremlins that like to take control. When you speak up and get your A$K on, is an incredible act of power. Okay, so they may say “NO” but that is okay. At least you took control and believe me, it is a powerful feeling when you speak the truth about what you truly want for your life.
I can’t wait to hear how you tap into your power this week. Hope you have a ThirtyOne-derful day!