Feel Good Friday

Socializing is Key to a Healthy Life

WOOHOO!  It’s Friday and who’s ready for the weekend?

Have you ever opted to stay in on a Friday night or maybe even the whole weekend avoiding being social?  I know sometimes we need rest and me time, BUT did you know social networking enhances your well-being?  Your mind and your body can actually react negatively to not socializing for more than a day.   Are all the introverts cringing, I know I was.  Yes, we are a little shyer and seem to flourish with more alone time than others, but the truth is if you isolate too much, it could lead to loneliness and reduce your quality of life.

Some of the best healthy lifestyle coaches will tell you having a great network of friends and family can boost happiness and health, as well as make you feel more connected to the world at large.

If you don’t make time for social commitments, you can’t build deeper connections with people.  You are at risk of missing out on memorable moments and good fun.  Here are some things which happen to your body and mind when you don’t socialize for more than a day.

1. Poor Self-Esteem

People who continuously isolate themselves day in and day out, tend to develop poor body image and self esteem over time.  Think back to those middle school years, I know for some a painful memory.  The truth is that a girl’s self-esteem peaks at the age of 9 years old and only 4% of women describe themselves as beautiful.  Something as simple as socializing could make a difference.

2. Depression

Studies show depression can be associated with isolating yourself and not socializing for more than a day at a time. Now, I am not advocating going out to happy hour every day, but it’s important to talk with co-workers, phone a friend, or attend a fitness class, so you can see people you know and care about during the day.  Believe it or not,  if you don’t, your mental health could suffer.

3. Loss Of Reality

According to an interview published in the Huffington Post, if you binge watch TV shows (of any kind of show) when they come to an end, it can trigger depression.  Why?  The inability to decipher between fiction and personal reality and when you tune into media too often it can interfere with the brain.  Personally, I think it would take a whole lot of BINGE watching.  What do you think?

4. Body Chills

Did you know you can literally feel chills from isolation in social circles.  If you aren’t surrounded by warmth and comfort, and you are isolating yourself regularly, you might notice a decrease in body temperature and increase in body chills.  Okay, I am ALWAYS cold so I am not sure I buy this one and yes I am an introvert.

5. Decreased Ability To Learn

Studies show lonely people are less able to do well with puzzles and mind games, due to the rewiring in the brain. I do puzzles ALOT to help re-wire my brain from the MS lesions and seem to do just fine.  Doing a puzzle with a friend would definitely be fun but I do enjoy the quiet time with my puzzles.

6. Decreased Sense Of Empathy

A research study shows people who are lonely are less empathetic than happier, socializing people, when shown pictures of pleasant and unpleasant scenarios.  According to this, when you isolate, you’re changing your brain and may hinder your ability to feel and love as well as others can.  Lonely = less empathy?  I always thought you would have more because you could understand the feelings others are having in unpleasant situations.

7. Inflammation

Did you know when you isolate, it lowers your quality of life which can cause depression and stress, which then shows up in the body as inflammation. Inflammation can lead to bloating, increased risk of illnesses, digestive issues, and inability to function.  Or it could be symptoms of a bigger problem?

8. Shorter Life Span

According public health professor at the University College London, being socially isolated for more than one day can lead to a shorter life which actually means dying at a younger age.  I have heard of people dying from a broken heart but it is usually when someone they love has passed away.  So, do we die from the isolation or the fact we are sitting on our butts, eating junk and not physically active?  Think about it, aren’t you more apt to be social when you are feeling good, after a walk or some type of physical activity?

9. Reduced Resilience

Whatever your reason for isolating, remember social interactions are crucial for a person’s happiness. Close, loving relationships and social interactions lead to the development of resilience, coping skills, and higher self-esteem. We all want to have high self-esteem, right?

Now, don’t shoot the messenger because I am not sure I agree with all of these things.  I do believe staying home too often, not being around people (family or friends) can have a negative impact on your life.  Talk a walk and interact with people.  It’s worth getting out more and making plans with friends, family, and co-workers.

Being around people and having close connections can be such a joy in life, so try to embrace it and find a happier balance between solo nights and those with others.

Have a ThirtyOne-derful day!

Unclutter Your Life

Confidence + Consistency = Success

16406522_10158289269920220_2415783648138027923_nThe year 2017 has become the year of “positive mantras” for me.  I am stomping on the inner gremlins and growing in confidence.  Confidence + Consistency = Success!  There is nothing to stand in the way of me reaching my goals….. but me!

I have those days…. the days when the inner gremlins wake me up in the middle of night telling me how horrible I am or beating me up for not being as good as someone else.  It has been awhile since I have talked about my inner gremlins.  WHY?  Because silly me thought they were gone.  I was feeling confident, positive and ready to conquer the world.

So what happen? Life…. yup.  Nothing earth shattering just every day normal stuff.  Got lots of Nos instead of Yes’s from people I asked to book a party.  Wasn’t I working on a 100 No Challenge?  Didn’t hit the mark on my daily steps.  The numbers on the scale not going down fast enough for me.  Income (sales, etc) not where I would like it to be to keep chopping away at old debt.  Oh, then the pancakes where a little thick.  I know, silly right?  But the truth is, I am not alone.  There are many of us who give those inner gremlins a crack in the door and they come barreling through.  Who is with me?

How many of you have let those little bumps in the road effect your entire day or week or month?  Those inner gremlins see an opening and they RUN through eager to help beat you up from the inside.  The rest of the world is like “no big deal”, “things will be okay” or “have patience” while we are in crisis mode beating ourselves up.

This year, I have been taking a stand.  I am working hard to stay out of the funk and slam the door on those nasty gremlins.  I mean if you are going to have a snowball of emotions, wouldn’t you rather it be positive then negative?

‘When you face a compelling opportunity to take action, fear lulls you into inaction, enticing you to passively watch its prophecies fulfill themselves.’  ‘Your fears distort your reality. Under the warped logic of fear, anything is better than the uncertain.’

WOW!  Deep, right?  But how many times have you had an opportunity to move forward toward success – your success – and fear came calling so you stopped in your tracks?  I think all of us have been there no matter what life stage we’re at.

Our fears, our critics, our heroes, our villains are all just our excuses, our rationalizations, our shortcuts, and our justifications.  We need to choose to see through them.  Or will you let fear paralyze you from going after what you want?

We need to hold ourselves accountable for every moment, every thought, and every detail. You need to see beyond your fears. Recognize your assumptions. Harness your internal strength. Silence your inner gremlins. Correct your misconceptions about success. Accept your strengths and your weaknesses, and understand the difference.  Open your heart to your bountiful blessings.

For me, it comes with positive mantras every morning.   I will admit, the “train your brain” concept was often lost on me.  I LOVE Dana Wilde BUT I always let fear and doubt overrule the training in my brain.  I borrowed some of Dana’s mantras, some from others I admire in business and some I wrote on my own.  I have found when the inner gremlins come knocking, I go to my office, read my mantras, take 5 minutes to feel them and visualize where I want to be personally and professionally.  It works!

So here are some of my mantras:

  • I am a successful CEO
  • I am making a difference in the lives of others
  • I am confident and strong
  • My incoming money far exceeds my outgoing
  • I am a blessed child of God
  • I am at my goal weight and easily maintain it

You get the idea, right?  I BELIEVE these things are going to happen.  I have decided NOT to let fear take control of my success.  What about you?a9ce067d6dba4e03b97b2ee477af0070

These words of wisdom may inspire you:

Do not pray for an easy life, pray for the strength to endure a difficult one. ― Bruce Lee

The way to happiness: Keep your heart free from hate, your mind from worry. Live simply, expect little, give much. Scatter sunshine, forget self, think of others. Try this for a week and you will be surprised. ― Norman Vincent Peale

The past is behind, learn from it. The future is ahead, prepare for it. The present is here, live it. ― Thomas S. Monson

Don’t count the days, make the days count. ― Muhammad Ali

Life’s a marathon, not a sprint. ― Phillip C. McGraw

What will be your mantra as you reach for your success?

Have a ThirtyOne-derful day!