Thankful Thursday: Labels

Thank you Deana Farrell for inspiring today’s message…..

Who are you? I mean your “identity” beyond titles, labels and your history?  For me, this is a tough one because I never knew who I was so I was always used a “label”……

 

“Who are you?” is a really powerful question.  With so many of us are looking for personal growth you would think it would be an easy one to answer.  What is the first thing you think of when you are asked this question????

For me, I would usually answer: what I did – mom or social worker or now retired.  Occasionally I would say self-employed.  I have friends who would answer with one of these:

• what we are working, wishing and hoping for (nope this one wasn’t for me)
• who means the most to us and
• where we’ve been and how we got to where we are

But, who are you? Think about it for a moment. Can you answer the question without rattling off your rank, title or accomplishments?  I know I can’t or at least I couldn’t before walking back into the doors of NA 16 months ago.  I was always a label, never knowing who I was.  A pretty scary thought.  I may not have an answer but I am working on one…

I’m a wife, a mom, retired social worker, MS warrior, grant writer, Jesus lover, entrepreneur, reader, blogger, daughter, sister, friend, encourager, crafter, recovering addict,  jean wearing, often a hot mess who is making progress to being a better version of me! If I really thought about it, I’m sure the list could go on and on…. just like yours, right?

My list reflects my story,  labels given to me by others, some I cherish while others I struggle with.  I remember (vaguely) a time when I had it all right – years ago my first time around in recovery.  I was confident in who I was and where I was going.  I didn’t let what others think control who I was or what I was doing.  I realize when I had my identity right, everything else fell into place.

Is who you are defined by labels or are you defined by the core values you cherish?  Are you a reflection of who you were created to be or are you still struggling with finding yourself?  I will admit, I was eager to work my fourth step because it I wanted to get to gut-honest.  I wanted to take a “searching and fearless moral inventory of myself”….. be careful what you wish for.  LOL. I may be struggling through the process but I can see the light at the end of the tunnel.  I know once I can identify who I am beyond the titles, labels and my history – I will be a better strong version of myself able to make decisions – even the touch ones.

I love these words from Deana:

You will find yourself very clear on the direction you want to go, even if you’re not sure of what it will take to get there, because you know WHO you need to be in order to get there.

Stop trying to fit in. If nothing else today, take some time to ponder this BIG question “Who are you?”.

I know by continuing on this journey, I will become the person God meant for me to be.  Believe me, I am right there with you Working on making progress toward what I need to do in order to live out who I was created to BE !

Have a blessed day!

 

Thankful Thursday: The Lens of Lovely

I  re-visited a blog I read some time ago by LYSA TERKEURST.  It changed my perspective on things a few years ago, and right about now, I could use a change in perspective when it comes to my weight and view of myself.  The blog was entitled  “Learn to Love Your Story“.  I am hoping it will chase  Negative Nellie away when it comes to how I view my body and my weight.  A change in perspective will help me get motivated and back on track to lose the few pounds I have gained…

Lysa talks about loving your story – your life – being content in the moment and enjoying it! WOW!  Most days I do love my life but then there are those curve ball weeks.  An emotional roller coaster and I am not sure why.  No major fiascos, no crisis – just little hiccups which quickly send me on a road less traveled (okay so maybe it is traveled a little bit more than I want it to be).  You know the journey with Negative Nelly where you struggle to see the light at the end of the rainbow?

Since starting my recover journey again, I can almost tell when I wake up, if I am going to love my story for the day.  Crazy, right?  Of course, I should carry a warning notice around my neck which was “STOP! NOT A GOOD DAY!”.  Send out a text alert to friends and family so they know to stay away.  LOL.  The reality is, on those days  I need to STOP, take a breathe and regroup.  The Serenity Prayer and the Third Step Prayer have become my go to for getting some peace in my life.  I need to then praise and thank God for my life… my story.  See I forget that sometimes.  My life may not be a story book or full of lots of happy endings but it is MY story.  It is the life God gave me or at least he tries to keep me on the right road when I take my will back.

Memories are hard for me.  But there are days when hubby and I talk about the past – reminiscing about days gone by.  I have no regrets nor does he because it is because of those things we are blessed to be in each other’s lives today.  We had our struggles.  We had our heartache.  We had our joys.  Life wasn’t perfect but we got through it to get us where we are today.  The struggles still come but now we try to look at the differently – together.  I am grateful for the times he helps me to remember by playing a song or sharing a picture.

Lysa talked about “pre-deciding” she would LOVE her story.  NOTE to self: change my point of reference BEFORE the day begins.  Stop thinking about the “what if” and “predicting” what may happen in any given situation.  I am learning to live in the moment thankful for being able on some days (working towards all days) to live without expectations.

I decided I would look at it all through the lens of noticing the rich evidence of life through each mess and mishap.

Did I do it all perfectly? Nope, not at all.

But even if we choose to be noticers with thankful hearts just once today, we’ll start to look at our stories in a different way.

A more beautiful way.

I remembered our key verse, Philippians 1:3, where Paul says “I thank my God every time I remember you.” I have plenty of reminders each day to thank God for the people in my life. To rejoice over every piece of my story. Starting with those shoes.

So I whispered, “Notice. Be a noticer. See all the fun represented here and thank God for these moments.”

Noticers see the lovely in front of them and learn to love their story.

What might happen if you pre-determined to look through the lens of lovely today?

Thank you Lysa for reminding me to look through the “lens of lovely” today.  What are you thankful for today?  Share it with us so we can all celebrate together.

Have a ThirtyOne-derful day!

How To Grow Your Business

January 31st and the end of the first “J month” of the year.  For those of us in direct sales, we have repeatedly been told J months are traditionally NOT good months.  I won’t lie – this January was not one of my better ones but it wasn’t bad.  I hit my personal minimum and my team hit theirs (barely) so I am okay with it.  

Thirty One offered a great opportunity to end December STRONG and to kickstart January with a 4-week Outlet Sale.  Every week they added new products to help us make money while helping our customers get GREAT deals.  Then things started to fizzle.  I struggled with how to transition online parties between the two catalogs.  I lost focus.  As a result, I think my team lost focus.  I know, what does this have to do with building your business, right?

The reality is sometimes we need to go back to basics.  Remember the things which helped us during the busy holiday season when business seemed to fall into our laps.  We picked up the phone or sent text messages to people when we saw something they were looking for.  We shared on social media the things we were loving.  We shared family and friends using our products.  January hit and things stopped.  Yes, we were tired.  Yes, we have a life (and maybe a day job and kids) in addition to our DS business.  BUT when we find just 20 minutes a day to work our business (or our hobby), we see results.

Another leader posted this quote and I LOVE IT:

Everyday should be an lesson in Empowerment with our teams. Teach a WoMan to fish and so she can feed herself for a lifetime! Don’t hold her captive so you can feel needed.

Don’t have a team – that’s okay.  The more you practice this recipe the easier it will be for your team (when you get one) to follow along.

EVERYONE has “stuff” going on in their lives… Full Time jobs, School, Kid(s), illness, social lives, part-time job(s)… EVERYONE has some “excuse”- as to why their business is not moving forward or moving at all….

It’s up to YOU to take the time, 20-31 minutes a day, to work your business or you will not see results. Operating a business or expecting results in ANYTHING takes positive behaviors consistently repeated.  Even if you are just doing it for fun (or a hobby), by being consistent you will see results from your hobby.  Who knows, it could turn into more???

What are these behaviors in our business you ask?

1. Making 3-5 contacts a day for sponsoring (recruiting), booking and selling
2. Check your back office for announcements & information Daily to stay up to date
3. Make the effort to communicate with your upline (the person who brought you into the business or someone above them)
4. Get organized (Search power hour on google and implement it)
5. Following Up! With customers, Hostess, potential recruits, people you met last week…
6. Be a Walking Billboard- Use the products! Share how they make a difference in your life!  Share DON’T sell!
7. Get a catalog. Open the catalog. Study and know your catalog! I will admit I don’t know all of the names of the products or the names of our prints BUT I do know where to find them in the catalog.  People will understand.  They don’t expect you to be a walking catalog of information but they do expect you to know the benefits of the products so you can help meet their needs.

Now Repeat!****

I know this seems so basic but it works. Ask the leaders in your company how they got to be at the top.  It wasn’t about “joining at the right time”.  It wasn’t about a shortage of consultants in their area.  It was about consistently sharing their product with friends and family – not being afraid to step out of their comfort zone.

What is holding you back from moving forward or earning a little bit more money?  Are you ready to kick things into gear in February?  Smash those inner gremlins who have convinced you January is a sign of things to come.

What is your best tip for being consistent in your business?

Have a ThirtyOne-derful day!

Throwback Thursday: So You Want to be a Leader?

June starts a new “fiscal year” with Thirty One and I am sure it is the same with many direct sales companies.  It is when I start looking back, not just at the past year but at my journey. It is when I start setting goals for myself for the new year.

Thirty One is offering an incredible opportunity right now….a chance to earn FREE Fall products AND up to $5000 in Disney bucks.

I love this incentive because the focus is on sharing the gift of Thirty One, NOT becoming a leader.  For some the word leader is scary.  I have heard it a million times, “I don’t want to be a leader”, “I don’t have the time”, “I won’t know what to do”, and the list goes on.  The BIGGEST tip I have given my team is: just share the gift of Thirty One and stop focusing on whether or not you will (or won’t) be a leader.  Have fun.  Help others. Share the excitement and the love.  The rest will fall into place.

This is a blog I wrote back in June, 2013.  I had only been a Director with Thirty One for about 8 months.  The thing is, this is still true today:

I never thought of myself as a leader, let alone a great leader.  I have always been a “behind” the scenes girl.  When attention was drawn to the work I did, I backed away and gave credit to bosses or those on my team, anyone else but me since I did not like being in the spotlight.  When I made the official decision to go into leadership with my Direct Sales company – the thought terrified me (and still does sometimes).  What did I know about being a leader?  I didn’t want to let anyone down – my up-line, my team, my family or friends.   I have been a “people pleaser” most of my life, a follower and not a leader.   

An interesting quote by Direct Selling Education Foundation said “the more others respect you as a leader, the more successful your business will be.”  

Here are some basic tips to help you to be a LEADER:

1. Keep your word.  This is a basic concept for life.  If you give someone your word, it should mean something.
2. Be inclusive, welcoming and make others feel safe.  If you do not get this kind of support from you company sponsor or director, find someone in the company who makes you feel this way.  I have been blessed with an AMAZING Sponsor (National Executive Director) Hope Shortt.  I want to be like her when I grow up.  Yes, I am much older than her but she is a leader I would follow to the ends of the earth.  I want my team to feel the same way. 
3. Encourage creative thinking.  This used to be hard for me, in my years in the non-profit world, as a Program Director.  I lacked confidence in myself so it was difficult to encourage creative thinking in my staff.  As I grew, so did they and so did my ability to encourage “outside of the box” thinking.  I encourage my team to build their business with a solid foundation of company standards (home parties, etc) and then get creative.  Make their business – THEIR business.  Stand out from the crowd. 
4. Allow people to share ideas and concerns.  My early management style was a dictator.  Fear, low self-esteem and lack of confidence had me instilling marshall law. As I got, older and squashed the inner gremlins, I learned to temper my demands and be open to suggestions.  I had a potential recruit come to a team training and share how she felt with my current party style.  It was not pretty.  WOW! In a room full of other consultants, it was a hard pill to swallow.  I listened and thanked her for her suggestions.  Yes, I quickly changed my party style so everyone is having fun (or at least I hope so).
5. Support others and help them grow.  I tell everyone who joins my team, they not only get their kit but they get me.  I am there to help them in good times and bad.  It isn’t just about MY income or MY goals but it is about helping them reach their dreams – big or small.     
6. Maintain an exciting and fun atmosphere.  In my past life, this was tough for me.  I was insecure and thought too much fun was a sign of bad management.  Over time, I found it was important to have a place people enjoyed working and coming to every day.  My team tells me all of the time – You are crazy!  I like to make things fun for them, get them excited and then they share the excitement with their customers and their teams.
7. Hold others accountable for their actions.  I was a tough boss in the workplace but EVERYONE got treated the same – good or bad.  As a leader In direct sales, I struggle with holding my team accountable for their actions/ goals.  I am always afraid they will perceive it as being all about me (and my paycheck) instead of hemming them attain their goals.  I will alway encourage them and help them along the way. 

As I have said before, I originally fell into leadership (as a Senior Consultant) but then I made a conscious decision to be a leader.  I do a little each week to work on my personal development.  I know  if I focus on overcoming my challenges as a leader, I will be able to be a more effective one for my team.  What qualities do you think make a good leader?

Have a ThirtyOne -derful day!

Help Us To Make A Difference

I know school isn’t out.  I know you are thinking about summer.  I know the last thing you want to hear about is back to school, right?

People start businesses for many different reasons.  Many will say it is to make money or to have a flexible schedule.  While others have a passion not tied to money (believe it or not!).   It may sound crazy BUT my motivation for my business goes far deeper than being able to pay bills.  Don’t get me wrong, I need to pay bills.

For as long as I can remember, I wanted to make a difference in the lives of others.  From raising funds for MDA as a kid to volunteering with disabled youth to being a social worker, I like to see people smile.  My business is no different.

I want to Bring a smile to face of those who are hurting and especially to kids because it is not usually their fault but the result of circumstances.  They need to know someone cares even in their darkest moments.

I have been doing give back programs since I started with Thirty One.  With the help of my family, friends and customers we have done zipper pouches for the Pediatrics Unit at Easter; Chemo comfort bags, and USA HERO zipper pouches for our Vets.  You have helped me to raise money for Smiles for Trevor, Relay for Life, Suicide Awareness and have helped families with medical expenses.  Together, we are making a difference in the lives of others especially women and children letting them know someone cares!

You know the “Back to School” campaigns which provide kids with backpacks and school supplies, right? These programs help each child start off the school year on the right foot.

Last year, we provided 31 children with THERMAL LUNCH TOTES filled with some healthy snacks.  Let’s be honest, the FREE lunch program doesn’t always have kid friendly foods. No hate mail PLEASE because I know there are some places with great meals but let’s be honest, not all of them do.

We will be doing this AGAIN this year.  For $20, you can sponsor a thermal tote filled with healthy snacks for a child in need. If you want to help BUT you don’t have $20, donate what you can – $1, $2, $5, or $10. Maybe finances are tight BUT you know a business who may want to help, GREAT! Let me know or forward this information to them. I will supply a list of business sponsors in every thermal tote along with blogging about them – FREE advertising for helping out a great cause. Where else could they get FREE advertising for $20 or $40?

Won’t you help to make a difference today?  You can fill out the form below or contact me directly. I will be happy to invoice you. Let’s bring a smile to the face of as many children as we can this school year.  The deadline is June 15th!

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Have ThirtyOne-derful day!